Ego Is The Enemy By Ryan Holiday

In Ego Is The EnemyRyan Holiday teaches you to stay humble in your aspirations, gracious in your success and resilient in your failures.

How to achieve your aspirations?

Ego is your worst enemy and can easily sink your ship.

Ego blocks your progress in life and sometimes fast tracks your downfall.

To improve and fight your ego, you must:

  • Be open to feedback but learn to evaluate your own abilities.
  • Practice detachment, tame your imagination before it runs wild and go through life with a quiet confidence.
  • Don’t stay stuck in your head. Instead, participate in what is going on around you.
  • Try staying silent in conversation. Silence can be strategic and is sustainable.
  • Always seek to learn. When you are a student, you absorb what is going on around you, you are focused on gaining knowledge and improving yourself.
  • Avoid being passionate. Instead, favor purpose and realism.
  • Ignore when people slight you and brush off the pain. Just think of it as you paying your dues.
  •  Avoid being prideful. Pride leads to arrogance. It impedes your ability “to learn, to adapt, to be flexible, to build relationships”.
  • Doing ever stop working.

Ego Is The Enemy By Ryan Holiday #book #bookreviews #leadershipbooks #leadership #ego #JourneyToLeadership

How to maintain success?

You have aspirations and you have worked so hard to climb the ladder of success.

However, when you start succeeding, you will start facing new ego problems that can quickly erode your success. To maintain long-term success:

  • Don’t pretend that you know what you are doing. Instead, keep learning, stay focused on facts and do your best.
  • Don’t compare yourself to others or try to keep up with the Joneses because you will end up doing things you don’t want to do.
  • Always remember your purpose and what is important to you before saying yes to opportunities.
  • Don’t be paranoid, entitled or controlling.
  • Learn to organize your thoughts, manage yourself and others.
  • Understand that selflessness and humility are strengths and not weaknesses.
  • Don’t try to be the center of attention, hug the spotlight and take credit for something you didn’t do or deserve.
  • Patiently progress towards you goals. It is better to go at it slow and steady.

How to handle failure?

Ego, power and success can make you delusional. You have to constantly self-monitor and stay attentive for your own downfalls.

Moreover, everybody goes through setbacks in life. Failure is not fair and happens to good people too.

But with a big ego, you tend to get caught by surprise. Your ego will make it hard for you to handle rock bottom.

To be resilient in your failures:

  • Know your worth.
  • Stay humble and on purpose.
  • Don’t abandon your principles and maintain your character.
  • Don’t depend on recognition and reward.
  • Make use of your environment and transform your failures into something positive.
  • Understand that, even if you do everything right and perfect, you still will experience failure.
  • Discipline yourself to do the right thing. It will be hard but it will makes you less self absorbed on the long run.

Review

Ego Is The Enemy by Ryan Holiday is short, practical and direct self-development book. 

According to Ryan Holiday, there are three stages in life: aspirations, success, failure. You will have to discipline your ego in all three stages if you want to get somewhere.

Ego is our own worst enemy. It becomes detrimental to suppress or manage our ego before we develop bad habits. For example, he warns us against common knowledge:

  • Don’t be passionate or you will fail. It is better to be apathetic and acknowledge the realities of your passions.
  • Don’t flatter your ego.
  • Don’t think you know everything.

Ego Is The Enemy is ideal for leaders who want to tame their ego, improve their leadership and relationships.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Ego is stolen. Confidence is earned. Ego is self-anointed, its swagger is artifice. One is
girding yourself, the other gaslighting. It’s the difference between potent and poisonous.

Detachment is a sort of natural ego antidote.

For your work to have truth in it, it must come from truth.

We will learn that though we think big, we must act and live small in order to accomplish what we seek.

The ability to deliberately keep yourself out of the conversation and subsist without its validation. Silence is the respite of the confident and the strong.

All of us waste precious life doing things we don’t like, to prove ourselves
to people we don’t respect, and to get things we don’t want.

Ratings 4/5

Author

Ryan Holiday

 

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Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World By Cal Newport

According to Cal Newport, Deep Working is “Professional activities performed in a state of distraction-free concentration that push your cognitive capabilities to their limit. These efforts create new value, improve your skill, and are hard to replicate.“.

What is Deep Work?

Deep Work means that we must learn to focus intensely on a single task for long periods of time without distractions and without breaking concentration.

Deep Work:

  • Requires a sense of confidence and a conviction that you will succeed.
  • Is at a disadvantage in a society that values social media.
  • Is not a trend but it can make you more efficient and transform a boring job into a satisfying one.
  • Is rare but is valuable in today’s economy. Deep Work ethics in the workplace is rare as well. Most people have embraced distraction because it is easier and allows us to avoid planning and concentration.

Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World By Cal Newport #books #bookreviews #success #focus #productivity #motivation #leadership #leadershipskills #leadershipmatters

How to train your brain and build habits for Deep Work

To create real value and to get ahead in this economy, it is imperative to develop an ability to:

  1. Learn and master hard things quickly.
  2. Produce at an elite level.

There are several rules to Deep Working and to replacing distraction with focus.

Rule #1: Work Deeply daily 

Deep Working is about building habits and rituals that go beyond willpower and that will help you sustain focus.

Personal desires such as eating, sleeping, sex, television and music are the main cause for distractions. Willpower is not sustainable enough to fight off distractions because your will will eventually be strained.

That is why Deep Work necessitates rearranging your schedule. You can schedule Deep Work by:

  • Minimizing shallow obligations from your day to day.
  • Dedicating a full day or more to concentrate on a task and to shut out all exterior noises.
  • Routinely going deep everyday at the same time and for the same amount of time.
  • Fit in Deep Work wherever and whenever you can.

Besides scheduling your Deep Work and to maximize your success, you must also establish how, what, where, when, for how long you want to practice Deep Work.

Rule #2: Embrace boredom

Deep Working requires that you focus on a task and reject all distractions in a world where your brain has been conditioned to research distraction.

Outside of Deep Work sessions, you have to take care of your mind, embrace boredom, learn to meditate, schedule a break from focus to give in to distractions, rewire your brain to resist distractions.

Surprisingly, embracing boredom will help you improve the limits of your concentration abilities.

Rule #3: Quit social media

There are many benefits to social media.

However, Cal Newport states that modern technology is to blame for shallow work and suggests that social media should be intrinsically used as a tool.

He also emphasizes that you must assess your priorities in life and the impact of social media on your life.

To regain control of your time and attention, you can apply the law of the vital few over your network tools then avoid using Internet to entertain yourself.

Rule #4: Drain the shallows

A deep life is a good life. - Cal Newport in Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World Click To Tweet

Shallow Work can be damaging to your life. Shallow Work can be defined as “Noncognitively demanding, logistical-style tasks, often performed while distracted. These efforts tend to not create much new value in the world and are easy to replicate.

To identify and remove the shallowness from your life, you must apply the following strategies:

  1. Schedule your entire day to avoid spending time on autopilot and to fully benefit from Deep Work.
  2. Determine how mush time you are spending on shallow activities and eliminate them.
  3. Become hard to reach via your network tools.

Review

Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World By Cal Newport #books #bookreviews #success #focus #productivity #motivation #leadership #leadershipskills #leadershipmatters

Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World, Cal Newport explains all the strategies you can implement to become more productive and more focused in this economy .

Cal Newport takes most of his analogies from educators because they have to go in depth in their field of choice and provide quality work.

However, this book is written for bosses and leaders who want to go to the essential, be more productive, efficiently organize their day, improve workplace culture and who want to achieve their highest potential.

It is sad to see that meditation, Deep Working and deep thinking have disappeared from and been perverted by the corporate system.

Indeed, corporate culture promotes shallows activities. People are busy as ever but are often distracted by network tools and forced to break from their concentration.

Furthermore, people –if they are not the person in charge–who practice Deep Working are not well perceived in the workplace even though they are high achievers and improve productivity.

Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World by Cal Newport is a good reminder to stay focus and to go to the essential in life.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

A deep life is a good life.

Deep work is at a severe disadvantage in a technopoly because it builds on values like quality, craftsmanship, and mastery that are decidedly old-fashioned and nontechnological.

The deep life, of course, is not for everybody. It requires hard work and drastic changes to your habits. […] But if you’re willing to sidestep these comforts and fears, and instead struggle to deploy your mind to its fullest capacity to create things that matter, then you’ll discover, as others have before you, that depth generates a life rich with productivity and meaning.

Ratings 3/5

Author

Cal Newport

The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership: Follow Them and People Will Follow By John C. Maxwell

According to John C. Maxwell, there are 21 irrefutable laws of leadership that every leader should hold on to.

The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership: Follow Them and People Will Follow By John C. Maxwell #books #bookreviews #leadership #leadershipskills #leadershipbooks #selfimprovement #selfawareness

1. The law of the lid

Your ability to lead determines your effectiveness, the height of your success, the limit of your vision, the impact of your influence.

To overcome the law of the lid, you have to increase your ability to lead.

2. The law of influence

Influence is an important part of leadership.

You have to put in work to gain influence. It is not about a title or a leadership position and cannot be bought.

With influence, you can rally people to a cause, move people in a new direction, and you can win people over on the long run.

3. The law of process

Leadership is a lifelong process.

LEADERSHIP IS DEVELOPED DAILY, NOT IN A DAY. - John C. Maxwell in The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership Click To Tweet

Leadership is a collection of skills that need continual improvement, personal growth and learning.

Leadership requires a lot of self discipline and determination. It is important for leaders to open themselves up for improvement to start slow and fight their way up.

4. The law of navigation

Leaders need to effectively navigate their way through life, while knowing people are depending on them.

In order to give themselves the best chances at success, they:

  • Are realistic.
  • Have to stay focused and in control.
  • Have a solid vision for their destination.
  • Have enough visibility to change course in time if they want to.
  • Draw their itinerary from their past failures and successes.
  • Listen to what their team has to say.
  • Don’t make commitments lightly.
  • Plan the course of their action.

5. The law of E. F. Hutton

Leaders become real leaders thanks to their character, relationships, knowledge, experience, past successes and abilities. People will not follow you because of your position.

The law of E. F. Hutton helps you figure out who the real leader in the room really is. To find the real leader, observe the reaction of the people in the room when the real leader speaks.

6. The law of solid ground

Leaders must communicate their character, exemplify their behavior, maintain their credibility and avoid breaking the trust of their followers.

When leaders make a mistake, they must quickly admit it and ask for forgiveness.

7. The law of respect

Leaders who are stronger and better leaders than their followers tend to gain respect.

8. The law of intuition

The law of intuition is a complex part of leadership, relies on instinct, facts and other factors.

Leaders who work with the law of intuition are able to sense a situation, to read people and themselves, to use their intuition to achieve their goals and to solve problems.

9. The law of magnetism

The law of magnetism states that who you are is who you attract.

Leaders who follow this law are able to attract the people who possess the same qualities as they do.

They attract people with same attitude, from the same generation and background, with the same values, life experiences and abilities.

Character makes trust possible. And trust makes leadership possible. - John C. Maxwell in The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership Click To Tweet

10. The law of connection

Leaders who observe this law touch people emotionally, know how to communicate with people, connect with them and show that they care.

The more leaders work on the connection with their employees, the more employees are loyal and demonstrate a strong work ethic.

11. The law of the inner circle

The people in the leader’s inner circle will determine the leader’s potential.

Leaders understand that they cannot be a lone ranger and acknowledge the purpose and strengths of the inner circle.

12. The law of empowerment

Successful and secure leaders empower and believe in their team.

Those who don’t create a barrier that their employees cannot overcome.

13. The law of reproduction

The law of reproduction works in a way where only leaders are capable of developing leaders and by teaching them what they know.

Some leaders don’t develop other leaders because they don’t have time or because of their own insecurities.

14. The law of buy in

People buy into leaders who have a vision.

If they don’t like the leader or the vision, they get another leader.

If the leader is credible, then people believe that the vision is credible as well.

15. The law of victory

Leaders who observe this law refuse defeat, dedicate themselves to victory and find a way to achieve success.

16. The law of the big mo

Leaders understand that to create change they need to create momentum.

Momentum is contagious, improves performance and makes the leader look good.

17. The law of priorities

Leaders spend their time prioritizing and recognize that doing more does not equate success.

They use the Pareto principle and the three Rs( requirement, return, reward).

18. The law of sacrifice

Sometimes, leaders have to sacrifice themselves to succeed and to gain opportunities.

The higher you go up on the ladder, the more you have to sacrifice.

19. The law of timing

Successful leaders read situations, recognize when to lead and when to take the right action at the right time.

20. The law of explosive growth

Potential leaders are hard to find and to attract but leaders who develop other leaders multiply growth within their organization.

21. The law of legacy

Leaders who leave a legacy lead with tomorrow in mind, make developing other leaders as part of the culture, sacrifice for future success and pass on the torch.

Review

The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership: Follow Them and People Will Follow is an easy to read leadership development book.

In The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership: Follow Them and People Will Follow, John C. Maxwell makes a list of 21 laws of leadership to help people better themselves and their organization.

These laws are the universal foundation for every area of your life. They can be learnt, be in standalone, have serious consequences, be practiced on a daily basis.

Maxwell has spent most of his life in leadership position. So, he entertains us with uncommon, historical and adventurous examples that everyone can relate to.

Finally, he encourages leaders to learn and go apply what they learnt.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Leadership is complicated. It has many facets: respect, experience, emotional strength, people skills, discipline, vision, momentum, timing—the list goes on. As you can see, many factors that come into play in leadership are intangible. That’s why leaders require so much seasoning to be effective.

The good news is that your leadership ability is not static. No matter where you’re starting from, you can get better.

The leader finds the dream and then the people. The people find the leader, and then the dream.

MANY PEOPLE TODAY WANT TO CLIMB UP THE CORPORATE LADDER BECAUSE THEY BELIEVE THAT FREEDOM AND POWER ARE THE PRIZES WAITING AT THE TOP. THEY DON’T REALIZE THAT THE TRUE NATURE OF LEADERSHIP IS REALLY SACRIFICE.

Ratings 4/5

Author

John C. Maxwell

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success By Carol S. Dweck

According to Carol S. Dweck in Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, children are eager to learn and never worry about failing.

It is only when they grow up that they don’t want to look foolish, and start defining themselves by their failures and successes.

However, the most successful people don’t worry about failing and have developed a Growth Mindset.

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success By Carol S. Dweck #books #bookreviews #mindset #leadership #leadershipskills

What is a Growth Mindset?

Mindsets are just beliefs. They’re powerful beliefs, but they’re just something in your mind, and you can change your mind. - Carol S. Dweck Click To Tweet

The Growth Mindset can be applied to different areas of our lives.

Growth Mindset consists in converting your past failures into successes.

It shows us how to:

  • Love and cope with failures.
  • Turn failures into a learning experience.
  • Cultivate your intelligence and most skills through failures and perseverance.
  • Challenge and stretch yourself.
  • Do your best and put forth the effort where there needs to be.
  • Change the beliefs about yourself and identify your personal qualities.
  • Avoid a life of regrets.

On the other hand, the Fixed Mindset limits our achievements.

The Fixed Mindset has been instilled in us, unbeknownst to us, since our tender childhood.

When you don’t have a Growth Mindset, you tend to:

  • Show more depression.
  • Believe that you possess fixed traits.
  • Look for outside validation or for people who are worse off than you are.
  • Feel an urge to succeed and to prove yourself.

How leaders grow their mindset?

Fixed Mindset leaders only hire people who can boost their ego and make them feel superior. They use their company as a display of their superiority.

They tend to compare themselves to others, to become abusive and controlling, to pick on people who perform at their best.

  1. Monitor your surrounding and your thought patterns. Then, understand the implications and what you can learn from your experience.
  2. Learn to maintain a sense of confidence and devote yourself to growing.
  3. Make concrete plans that you can visualize.
  4. Understand that your plans will fail from time to time and that you will have to develop strategies to maintain your Growth Mindset.
  5. Don’t hide your mistakes and don’t be defensive about it.
  6. Take care of your people.
  7. Don’t allow groupthink and allow dissenting voices to speak up.
  8. Don’t feel threatened by high performing employees and help your employees improve on the job.
  9. Ask for feedback and for more information to learn.
  10. Stop beating yourself up when you have failed.
  11. Remember that everyday is an opportunity to learn.

Review

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol S. Dweck is a self-help book that encourages introspection and teaches us how to develop a “Growth Mindset”.

In Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, Carol S. Dweck shares poignant examples of people who have embraced the Growth Mindset, overcome challenges and achieved personal success.

In addition, Carol S. Dweck recaps all the ways we can be harboring a fixed mindset in our parenting, relationships and leadership.

She also asks significant questions to help us determine whether or not we have a Growth or Fixed Mindset.

I wish there were more detained and practical advice or a step by step guide on how to acquire a Growth Mindset.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

People may start with different temperaments and different aptitudes, but it is clear that experience, training, and personal effort take them the rest of the way.

Mindsets are just beliefs. They’re powerful beliefs, but they’re just something in your mind, and you can change your mind.

Even in the growth mindset, failure can be a painful experience. But it doesn’t define you. It’s a problem to be faced, dealt with, and learned from.

Real self-confidence is not reflected in a title, an expensive suit, a fancy car, or a series of acquisitions. It is reflected in your mindset: your readiness to grow.

Ratings 3.5/5

Author

Carol S. Dweck

 

13 Leadership Books Every Up&Coming Leader Should Read To Achieve Success

There comes a time when leaders feel stuck in a rut, unable to solve problems or constantly being blindsided by events.

That is because they lack wisdom and character, they don’t have the appropriate knowledge of themselves and of the situation.

13 Leadership Books Every Up&Coming Leader Should Read To Achieve Success #success #books #bookreview #leader #leadership

Books provide valuable information for leaders to grow and to improve themselves.

Reading has to play an important part in leadership.

The following books will help you improve your self-awareness, develop your character, build your vision and your purpose.

1. The Alchemist

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Author: Paulo Coelho

Ratings: 4.5/5

The Alchemist outlines the journey of a leader.

It teaches us to be ourselves and to follows our heart and gut.

It reminds us that failure always brings us closer to our success and that all we need is already within us.

 

2. The Four Agreements

 

Author: Don Miguel Ruiz

Ratings: 4.5/5

The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz gathers four “agreements” to live by to ensure a better lifestyle, a deeper understanding of life, a life in the moment.

He encourages us to be impeccable with our words, to not take anything personally, to not making assumptions and to do our best.

3. Radical Candor: How to Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean

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Author: Kim Scott

Ratings 3/5

In Radical Candor: How to Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean, Kim Scott reveals ways to be truthful, to develop candid relationships.

Being truthful without being a bully is difficult. Candor comes with risks but it will determine your level of success in the long run.

4. Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges

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Author: Amy Cuddy

Ratings: 3.5/5

Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges, Amy Cuddy gives advice on managing nonverbal cues to induce Presence, identifying your best authentic self, nurturing your boldest self, and creating personal power.

It is useful for leaders who want to get in touch with their best self.

5. H3 Leadership: Be Humble. Stay Hungry. Always Hustle.

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Author: Brad Lomenick

Ratings: 4/5

H3 Leadership: Be Humble. Stay Hungry. Always Hustle.Brad Lomenick draws conclusions from his personal leadership style and allies spirituality with leadership.

He shares various tips on being a better leader. He also urges us to define who we are, to identify where you are going and how you will get there.

6. Principles: Life and Work

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Author: Ray Dalio

Ratings: 3/5

Dalio shares many principles to navigate life and work.

Ray Dalio encourages us to stay open-minded, to find and speak truth in order to live a healthier lifestyle, to meet our goals and to handle setbacks.

 

7. Tribes: We need you to lead us

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Author: Seth Godin

Ratings: 3/5

In Tribes: We need you to lead us, Seth Godin declares that everybody wants and needs to belong to a tribe.

He also demonstrates how challenging the status quo is a simple way to create your own tribe, to build your fellowship, to define your leadership without forcing people.

 

8. No One Understands You and What To Do About It

 

Author: Heidi Grant Halvorson

Ratings: 4/5

In No One Understands You and What To Do About It, Heidi Grant Halvorson explores the prominent reasons why we are often misunderstood.

She also gives useful advice on how to clean up our reputation, to clarify a difficult situation.

 

9. What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful

What Got You Here Won't Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful By Marshall Goldsmith

 

Author: Marshall Goldsmith

Ratings: 4/5

In What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More SuccessfulMarshall Goldsmith helps you identify all the 21 bad behaviors that are currently holding you back from success.

He also provides different solutions so you develop your character and be your best self at work.

 

10. Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior

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Author: Mark Goulston, Philip Goldberg

Ratings 3/5

Mark Goulston and Philip Goldberg list all the common self-defeating habits that we have acquired in life and have brought to work.

In order to achieve success, they show us how to get out our own way, how to stop self-sabotaging, how and what to change.

11. Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit Of Less

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Author: Greg Mckeown

Ratings: 4/5

Essentialism is a thought process that drives success, that improves your decisions making and time management skills.

In Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit Of Less, Greg Mckeown replaces the false assumptions that we can do it all, that being busy means being productive, that we must accept every single opportunity that comes our way.

12. Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us

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Author: Daniel H. Pink

Ratings: 4/5

In Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us, Daniel H. Pink shows us that people are not motivated by common external factors such as money or fame. 

Daniel H. Pink reveals that people’s behaviors are mostly driven by purpose, passion, autonomy, a need for self-improvement and for self-imposed goals.

Leaders can use that innate drive to increase productivity, improve performance and build stronger teams.

13. Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance

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Author: Angela Duckworth

Ratings 3/5

In Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, Duckworth defines Grit as a combination of resilience, determination, purpose and passion. 

According to Angela Duckworth, anyone can acquire grit. Furthermore, people with grit are more successful than people who are talented but who don’t put in work.

 

 

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Best Self: Be You, Only Better By Mike Bayer

In Best Self: Be You, Only Better, Mike Bayer encourages people to be their Best Self.

What is your Best Self?

Your Best Self is unique, positive, evolved and aligned with your truth.

When you are being your best self, you are being your most authentic and at your core.

Best Self: Be You, Only Better By Mike Bayer #books #bookreview #selfesteem #selfimprovement #leader #leadership #selfdevelopment #lifecoaching #lifecoach

How to connect with your Best Self?

Connecting with your Best Self takes time and requires patience. To get in touch with your Best Self:

  • Express gratitude frequently to get out of a negative space. Make a gratitude list of everything that puts you in a good mood or elevates you in any kind of way.
  • Embrace change. Everybody can change if they want to, they just have to apply the right motivations.
  • Identify your fears. Once you have identified your fears, put them to the test to see if your assumptions are true, if they are rational, if they help you succeed, or if they serve your best interests.
  • Recognize any signs of egotistical behavior. Once you have acknowledge your behavior, assess the origins of it and get your ego in check.

Assessing your Best Self

“SPHERES stands for Social life, Personal life, Health, Education, Relationships, Employment, and Spiritual life”.

The SPHERES tool, create by Mike Bayer, is a screening tool used to assess your Best Self in all areas of your life.

Your social life 

In the SPHERES tool, your social situation determines how well you project your Best Self to the world.

It then becomes imperative to analyze how you interact with people. You can also assess your ability to send clear messages, to listen to others, to embrace human emotions, to handle highly charged situations, to give and receive feedback.

Your personal life

Your personal life contains your self-image, your self-talk, the level of compassion and respect you have for yourself.

To create the personal life that you want, you will have to:

  • Rewire your brain to think positively by challenging your internal dialogue.
  • Get familiar with what you are constantly telling yourself.
  • Identify the messages you tell yourself when you are under pressure.
  • Log your thoughts and your self-talk, identify the common themes and tones.
  • Be compassionate with yourself. Take care of yourself and monitor your stress levels before they snowball. If you take care of yourself, you will definitely be able to take care of others.
  • Connect with your passions. Your passions will vary throughout your life. Your passions will allow you to express yourself, to strengthen your bond with your Best Self and vibrate at a higher frequency. To find your passions, explore new things, challenge yourself and get out of your comfort zone.

Your health

Prioritizing your well-being allows you to be present, keep a clear mind and achieve your Best Self.

Your education

Remaining in a “lifetime learning mode” will help you evolve into your Best Self and become more self-aware.

Once you find your passions, you will take pleasure in acquiring knowledge in that field.

Your relationships

Your relationships reflect who you are as a person.

Your Best Self will gauge who you want to be around, judge the health of a relationship and help you make the tough decisions.

In order to stay connected to your Best Self in all relationships, you must define your core values, exercise them and identify the people who live up to them.

Your employment

We spend most of our days at work.

So, when we are not able to fully be ourselves, our work life tends to become draining.

It somehow becomes important to nurture our Best Selves at work or create a career path that allows us to maximize our potential at work.

Review

In Best Self: Be You, Only Better, Mike Bayer shares tips and tools to help you achieve your Best Self. He helps you make a diagnostic of all the aspects of your life and provides practical solutions to your problems.

Furthermore, Best Self: Be You, Only Better is a workbook that teaches you how to fix what’s inside to fix outside. It is on point when it comes to assessing people’s behavior and can conveniently be revisited several time in your life.

Best Self: Be You, Only Better is ideal for leaders who want to improve their leadership skills and bring their best selves at work. It becomes clear that if you are your best self, you can create the best teams, take care of others and create the best organization.

With this workbook:

  • Get in touch with your Best Self.
  • Reach your highest potential.
  • Find more balance in your life.
  • Evolve, change, reinvent yourself and improve your life.
  • Learn to handle adversity and crisis.
  • Discover your truth and your purpose.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Many of society’s “rules” simply don’t apply to us as individuals, and if we spend all our energy on trying to be, do, say, and act like society wants us to, we are simply wasting time we could be spending on discovering and connecting with our Best Self.

Self-care is foundational to living your ideal life.

Ratings 4/5

Author

Mike Bayer

Unbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level By Mark Divine

Unbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level by Mark Divine provides methods and strategies to:

  • Develop an unbeatable mind.
  • Deal with harsh realities.
  • Increase your personal power.
  • Improve your thought pattern and find your positive focus.
  • Master and outperform yourself.
  • Train your team.

An Unbeatable Mind?

A person with an unbeatable mind is always original, cultivates excellence, seeks to magnify his or her potential and hates mediocrity.

In addition, an unbeatable mind follows universal laws and truths, is resilient, has great character and leadership qualities.

Furthermore, an unbeatable mind avoids group-thinking, procrastination and inaction.

According to Divine, it is imperative that you gain mental control, acquire mental toughness and develop leadership qualities.

Unbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level By Mark Divine #books #bookreview

How to find your positive focus and gain mental control?

Spending time alone and in silence, quieting your mind is discouraged in Western society.

We are rarely, if ever, encouraged to spend time in silence or get to know the depth of our character. - Mark Divine Click To Tweet

People are therefore prone to negative thinking. However, negativity destroys performance and brings down your energy.

In order to find a positive focus and gain mental control:

  1. Be aware of your negativity. To become self-ware, practice silence, define your passion, principles and purpose.
  2. Prohibit the negative self-talk.
  3. Focus on positive self-talk or affirmations. Add positive imagery and feelings to those affirmations.
  4. Find a mantra or an affirmation that will run in the background of your mind.

How to gain mental toughness?

Mental toughness is sustaining positive focus on one task, on the one thing that keeps you going.

Mental toughness helps you concentrate on your tasks for long periods of time without any distractions.

To develop mental toughness:

  1. Practice concentration on a daily basis.
  2. Understand that your overall success depends on every single choice that you make.
  3. Acknowledge that the small choices lead you towards excellence and shape your life the most.
  4. Educate yourself on how stress works, how you react to it and learn to eliminate it from your life.

Develop the disciplines of a Warrior

According to Mark Divine, Warriors are those who have achieved mental control and mental toughness.

They have learnt to discipline their mind so they can focus on the things that matter most, maintain positive focus when they need it most, avoid being distracted by negative emotions and negative beliefs.

Since the Warrior is committed to mastering himself or herself, he or she has mastered the following disciplines:

  1. Simplicity. They have learnt to detach themselves from material things that they don’t need.
  2. Dedication. They apply themselves daily but don’t take themselves too seriously.
  3. Authenticity. They are honest with themselves.
  4. Service. They build up their character.

Warriors with unbeatable minds:

  • Develop a strong plan and discipline.
  • Commit daily to the plan.
  • Are mindful of their decisions.
  • Stay in the present moment.
  • Maintain their energy and their positive focus.
  • Fulfill their purpose.
  • Make change happen.
  • Step up their game and take action.
  • Lead themselves and work with an unbeatable team.
  • Do what is best for their team.
  • Align their team with their vision and purpose.

Review

Unbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level By Mark Divine #books #bookreviewUnbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level by Mark Divine is a great guide for being and maintaining positivity no matter what.

Mark Divine gives sound and practical advice, using his 20 years of experience as a Navy Seal.

Mark Divine applies what he learnt with the NAVY to his regular life and work. He teaches you how to:

  • Discipline yourself and manage your emotions.
  • Reject mediocrity.
  • Build up your resilience.
  • get the life and career you want.

Unbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level is useful for leaders, corporate teams and all those who want to condition their mind, body and soul.

I definitively loved the military aspect, principles and parallels in the book. However, because of his experience, some of his analogies are extreme and unrelatable.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Consistency is the omnipotent force behind change.

We are rarely, if ever, encouraged to spend time in silence or get to know the depth of our character.

Negativity destroys performance in the short term and precludes success and happiness in the long term.

Lack of meaning and purpose is a major cause of despair and despondency in the world.

Ratings 4/5

Author

Mark Divine

The Obstacle is the Way : The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph by Ryan Holiday

Not everyone knows how to handle obstacles. Most people tend to quit at the sight of adversity.

Overcoming obstacles and standing tall in adversity are a learned behavior. To turn your trials into triumphs, you must:

  • Change our bad perceptions of events.
  • Take directive actions.
  • Strengthen your will power.

The Obstacle is the Way _ The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph by Ryan Holiday

Change your perception

Your perception has power over you and your decisions.

Building up your perception takes time and a lot of practice. You must discipline your emotions and objectively perceive your world for what it is and not for how it wants to be seen in order to :

  • Temper your passions and primal feelings,
  • Become objective and access the truth.
  • Stay cool under pressure.
  • Stay present and positive.

Your mind is a powerful tool. To actively change your perception:

  • Understand that you cannot change the obstacles.
  • Understand that you are in control of how you perceive the world and your obstacles.
  • Believe that you can choose how to respond to different situations. You can always oppose negativity or shake it off.
  • Trust that you are the one who decides of the outcome of the situation.
  • Assume that there are no good or bad events in life. By thinking so, you make it so.
  • Feel your emotions but get your emotions under control.
  • Tell yourself the truth and be authentic.
  • Use your personal resources wisely. For example, don’t waste your time trying to understand why a situation is the way it is. Those reasons don’t matter.
  • See obstacles as challenges or opportunities to observe, to grow, to improve yourself, to acquire new skills and to try new tactics.
  • Do not make assumptions.
  • Be present, be bold and take calculated risks.
Our perceptions can be a source of strength or of great weakness.-Ryan Holiday in The Obstacle is the Way : The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph. Click To Tweet

Take directive action

After you have corrected your perception, it is time to learn how to act it out.

Each and every one of your actions must serve a purpose.

To act towards your goals with your new perception:

  • Remember that where you start is not where you will end.
  • Start somewhere and fight to create momentum in whatever you undertake.
  • Take the time to explore and to learn.
  • Avoid complaining and take “directive action”. If you have taken action, persevere and don’t quit no matter what.
  • Expect the execution of your plan will be difficult.
  • See obstacles as a way to test your character.
  • Turn negatives into positives.
  • Do not dwell or waste time dwelling on the hand that life has dealt you.
  • Take responsibility for your actions.
  • Don’t let distractions or failed actions stop you. Instead, fail forward, learn from your failures and don’t take them personally.
  • Manage your energy and always do your best with what you have.

Increase your will power

Your will power is something that can never be taken from you.

Maintaining it requires a deep understanding of life.

To increase your will power:

Review

The Obstacle is the Way : The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph is a motivational book that encourages people to withstand adversity and to take action despite adversity.

Ryan Holiday shares a philosophical approach, rooted in stoicism, that will help you confront obstacles and turn them upside down.

The Obstacle is the Way : The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph is destined for leaders and entrepreneurs who:

  • Face challenges on a daily basis,
  • Need to make pragmatic decisions and take calculated risks,
  • Want to take their career or business to the next level.

Holiday‘s entire book is based on classical references, historical figures and war leaders, who have distinguished themselves in life and who have adopted stoicism as a life strategy.

Finally, Ryan Holiday also incorporates reputable leaders and entrepreneurs as examples of resilience and will power.

If you want to stay motivated and push through your challenges, this book is for you.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Our perceptions can be a source of strength or of great weakness. If we are emotional, subjective and shortsighted, we only add to our troubles.

Obstacles make us emotional, but the only way we’ll survive or overcome them is by keeping those emotions in check—if we can keep steady no matter what happens, no matter how much external events may fluctuate.

Focusing exclusively on what is in our power magnifies and enhances our power. But every ounce of energy directed at things we can’t actually influence is wasted—self-indulgent and self-destructive. So much power—ours, and other people’s—is frittered away in this manner.

If you mean it when you say you’re at the end of your rope and would rather quit, you actually have a unique chance to grow and improve yourself. A unique opportunity to experiment with different solutions, to try different tactics, or to take on new projects to add to your skill set.

Leadership requires determination and energy. And certain situations, at times, call on leaders to marshal that determined energy simply to endure.

Ratings 4/5

Author

Ryan Holiday

 

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Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges By Amy Cuddy

Presence is an indicator of success and an “incredible powerful state”.

Presence is hard to define and is subjective.

However, it can be understood with verbal and non verbal cues.

It can be predicted by your “confidence, comfort level, and passionate enthusiasm”.

What is Presence?

Presence, as I mean it throughout these pages, is the state of being attuned to and able to comfortably express our true thoughts, feelings, values, and potential. Click To Tweet

With presence, you can be yourself, be honest with yourself, be in the moment, connect with others, represent yourself well, and reveal the abilities you truly have.

Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges By Amy Cuddy

What are the benefits of achieving Presence?

Presence allows you to listen, to hear other people out and to be heard in return.

Presence establishes trust and creates influence.

Presence aligns your beliefs with yourself.

Where does Presence come from?

It comes from believing your own stories and from being authentic.

When we don’t believe in our own stories, we will have a hard time convincing others, we will come off as inauthentic and consequently lose confidence in ourselves.

To identify your boldest and most authentic self:

  • Write down who you think you are.
  • Speak the truth to yourself.
  • Believe in your truth.
  • Believe that your truth will be conveyed properly.

What obstructs Presence?

There are a few conditions that can destroy your Presence:

  1. Impostorism

Impostorism makes you question your abilities and makes you worry about what other people think about you.

This condition is not unique to highly achieving women and is independent from the number of achievements received in life.

  1. Stereotypes

Not conforming to stereotypes or to social expectations make achieving Presence difficult.

  1. Powerlessness

Powerlessness makes you self-conscious, perturbs your self-image, and blocks your authenticity and your abilities.

How to acquire Presence?

Personal power is power to—the ability to control our own states and behaviors. Amy Cuddy in Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges Click To Tweet

You gain Presence by developing personal power.

Personal power is essential, removes fear, quiets inhibitions, protects you against your negative emotions, allows you to forgive easier and fluctuates in time.

In addition, your personal power makes you fearless, gives your more freedom, and makes you less susceptible to external pressures.

However, it can be acquired using different tactics. For example, you can use breathing techniques and power poses to trigger personal power.

When we have personal power, we tend to remain calm, to have more control and to expand ourselves in order to take place.

Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges By Amy Cuddy

Review

Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges by Amy Cuddy revolves mainly about managing your nonverbal cues to induce Presence, identifying your best authentic self, nurturing your boldest self, and creating personal power.

In Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges, Amy Cuddy:

  • Aims to help people with imposter syndrome, who are in difficult challenges, who feel powerless and distracted.
  • Gives advice on how to handle conflict, how to stay optimistic, to act confident, even when you don’t feel confident, until you become confident.
  • Wants people to gain more control over their lives.
  • Uses stories from people around the world who have seen her TED Talk to inspire and convey her message.

I have to say, I enjoyed the topic of personal power the most. Often, we see leaders who are afraid of going against the grain, try to fit in and to please their team, only to find out that it’s an impossible task.

Some lead using their social power, leveraging salary for work but lack influence and personal power.

Needless to say, their success will depend highly on how they carry themselves, on their verbal and non verbal cues.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Presence stems from believing in and trusting yourself—your real, honest feelings, values, and abilities.

Presence, as I mean it throughout these pages, is the state of being attuned to and able to comfortably express our true thoughts, feelings, values, and potential.

A truly confident person does not require arrogance, which is nothing more than a smoke screen for insecurity. A confident person—knowing and believing in her identity—carries tools, not weapons. A confident person does not need to one-up anyone else. A confident person can be present to others, hear their perspectives, and integrate those views in ways that create value for everyone.

Power makes us approach. Powerlessness makes us avoid.

The feeling that arises from personal power is not the desire to have control; it’s the effortless feeling of being in control—lucid, calm, and not dependent on the behavior of others.

Ratings 3.5/5

Author

Amy Cuddy

Radical Candor: How to Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean By Kim Scott

Being a boss is a full-time job and is not as easy as it seems.

The truth is, being the boss can be an emotional rollercoaster.

It requires maturity, focus and emotional discipline, especially when dealing with people.

That is why Kim Scott has established a few principles that can help bosses create a culture of candor, build stable relationships and evolve into great bosses.

According to Kim Scott, managers, leaders or bosses:

  1. Achieve results.
  2. Deal with people.
  3. Express what they think.
  4. Build and guide cohesive teams.
  5. Accept and give fair and candid feedback.

As you can see, Kim Scott makes no distinction between a boss, a leader and a manager because eventually, they have to assume different roles and master different skills at different moments.

They all have to find out a way to get what they want by saying what they mean.

Radical Candor: How to Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean

Radical Candor_ Be a Kickass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity by Kim Scott (2)

Why and how to build relationships?

The relationships you have with your team determine your level of success, company culture, and performance.

To build great relationships that will help your business:

  • Take care of yourself first.
  • Stay centered and create a healthy work life balance.
  • Find out what works best for you and apply it.
  • Care personally about people.
  • Respect boundaries and people physical space. It is detrimental to find a balance between creating personal yet professional bonds.
  • Spend time alone with your team members.
  • Stay true to your values and share them if possible.
  • Be transparent and aware of your emotions.
  • Discipline your reactions. Learn to respond and not react.

Why and how to build a great team?

People’s motivations are personal.

Every team member can be exceptional, they just have to find the right fit and the right motivations.

Needless to say, work life is better when your team loves what they do.

To build a great team:

  • Get to know the people on your team. Focus more on them than on results.
  • Understand people’s strength and weaknesses, identify how they tick and how their job fits into their life plan.
  • Avoid micromanaging or ignoring your team members.
  • Allocate as much time to those who are struggling as the top performers.
  • Listen to your team members, learn to incorporate their thinking into yours, and give them the opportunity to complain, share ideas, and raise issues. This way, you will create a culture of innovation.

Why and how to accept/give feedback?

Feedback is an uncomfortable process. To accept and give proper feedback:

  • Earn your team’s trust.
  • Listen more than you speak.
  • Understand what motivates your team and help them avoid burnout or boredom.
  • Understand your audience and adapt to it.
  • See feedback as an act of guidance and don’t make it personal.
  • Solicit feedback especially in private conversations and outside of meetings.
  • Voice your own disagreements. Speak up when things are not going well.
  • Take responsibility fo your actions and admit when you have made a mistake
  • Discern the truth from a lie when it comes to feedback.
  • Be humble in your delivery and state that you want to help.

Why and how to achieve results?

Every boss wants results. To achieve results:

  • Have frequent one on one conversation with your team and with a positive mindset. Have a one on one conversation with your team members to get to know them, to solve problems effectively and to help you understand what is working and what is not.
  • Create key metrics to measure progress. Write down any possible updates.
  • Create meetings where you can debate, encourage new ideas and make big decisions.
  • Test out the feasibility of the ideas you have received.

Review

Radical Candor: How to Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean By Kim Scott is a step by step guide on how to be a candid boss.

It is about building candid relationships with the people you work with and about using your humanity as a leadership tool.

Radical Candor: How to Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean By Kim Scott essentially takes the pressure off leaders.

The principles shared expose candor as a management tool, put bosses at ease and help them understand that there is more to being a boss than giving orders.

In addition, the principles shared remove fear, self-doubt and anxiety, then create an understanding regarding the role of a boss.

Furthermore, Kim Scott uses her own experiences at Google and Adsense to drive the conversation and to illustrate her ideas about radical candor.

She provides amazing tools and techniques to implement in order to be a great boss and to have a healthy relationship with your direct reports.

Her tools and techniques are detailed and are not exclusive to bosses.

Finally, the best thing about this book is that you can tell that Kim Scott cares about the career advancement and the emotional health of every boss.

Through radical candor, she demonstrates how to improve all aspects of your work life.

You don’t have to implement every tool or technique right away.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

In order to build a great team, you need to understand how each person’s job fits into their life goals

The way you treat people determines whether you’ll get their best effort, a perfunctory effort, or an effort to sabotage you.

Ratings 3/5

Author

Kim Scott