Quiet Girls Can Run the World : Owning Your Power When You’re Not the “Alpha” in the Room By Rebecca Holman

A good leader can either be an alpha or a beta woman.

The truth is that being an alpha or a beta leader doesn’t really matter and is just a way to box people in. 

Quiet Girls Can Run the World : Owning Your Power When You're Not the "Alpha" in the Room By Rebecca Holman #book #bookreviews #introversion #quietleadership #introvertedleader https://journeytoleadershipblog.com

1. The influence of popular culture and unconscious biases

Popular culture creates the definition of alpha and beta and shapes unconscious biases. 

In popular culture, women have been portrayed very differently. Movies have become critical in the opinions that women form of themselves and have about their ambitions and aspirations. 

Indeed, movies and popular culture create unconscious gender and racial biases in the workplace. 

On one hand, alpha women are all we see in the media world today. Alpha women are presumably in control, career driven and are not as lovable as beta women. They are either difficult, evil or unhappy.

On the other hand, beta women are supposedly not career-driven. They would use their job to fill a void until a man comes along to improve their lives.

In reality, beta women are not necessarily timid or introverted. They just don’t push their own agenda, intend to fit in at work and bypass their own ego. They also tend to reserve their opinion for themselves, give constructive criticism, and take time to make decisions. In addition,  they are emotionally intelligent, flexible, pragmatic and are able to work with different personality types. 

Most of the time, if the male counterparts watch these movies or conform to popular beliefs and if women don’t exhibit leadership traits as seen on TV, then they don’t believe that women possess any leadership traits. 

Furthermore, according to recent studies, alpha women who participate in meetings are seen as dominating when being dominating is a key component in alpha men leadership style. Beta men who are relaxed leaders are seen positively whereas beta women who exhibit the same trait are not even seen as leaders. 

To overcome these biases, popular culture needs to be updated.

2. Success for women in the workplace

As hard as it is to quantify success, both women and men generally get confused about what success really looks like.

Often, a job and the level of success are directly related to a personality even though the personality doesn’t do the job.

Women generally set the bar too high for themselves and are unable to emulate the standard of perfection. For instance, successful women are expected to be in charge of the room, of the conversation and meetings.  

Moreover, the only two women in the workplace are usually pitted against each other because men decided that there can only be one successful woman in the room. 

Before rushing towards success, women need to:

  • Understand what success actually looks like and take steps towards success.
  • Watch their presentation, protect their identity and don’t let their workplace define them.
  • Check the standards set by employers, themselves and others. 
  • Beat to the sound of their own drum.
  • Stay authentic. Authenticity allows you to retain a sense of self. Authenticity has allowed many people to achieve success and connect with others.
  • Take time to do nothing and don’t spread themselves thin. 

Review

Quiet Girls Can Run the World : Owning Your Power When You’re Not the “Alpha” in the Room by Rebecca Holman is exploring the various ways that women can deal with different types of environments without compromising their sense of self.

The roles of women in the workplace lack so much nuance. Rebecca Holman is attempting to figure out if beta women can be as successful as alpha women in the workplace by comparing the traits of alpha and beta women without placing one above the other. 

Quiet Girls Can Run the World : Owning Your Power When You’re Not the “Alpha” in the Room is also a hilarious guide on how to embrace who you are, how to find out what works for you without faking it, how to navigate office politics, various bosses without suppressing your identity, ambitions, needs and wants.

Being an alpha or beta leaders does not matter. What really matters is that you get to know yourself and what works for you.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Success at work only looks one way. And a successful woman? She’s shouting louder than everyone else in the room. She’s stubborn and argumentative because these are signs that she’s passionate about the project at hand and cares about its success above all else. Ergo, she’s good at her job.

“the media is selling the idea that girls’ and women’s value lies in their youth, beauty, and sexuality and not in their capacity as leaders. Boys learn that their success is tied to dominance, power, and aggression. We must value people as whole human beings, not gendered stereotypes.”

It matters because women’s voices simply aren’t being heard on their own terms. Numerous studies have shown that women are interrupted far more often in meetings than men, as well as in the classroom—as a 2004 study from Harvard Law School demonstrated. And, according to a study by Princeton and Brigham Young University, if women talk 25–50 percent of the time in a professional meeting, they are seen as “dominating the conversation.

Similarly, studies show that while men in leadership positions are seen in a positive light when they demonstrate traditionally Alpha leadership traits (such as being decisive, dominating the conversation, being dogged and dogmatic in the pursuit of goals), women who demonstrate traditional Alpha leadership traits are viewed negatively by both men and women. And while men who have a more relaxed or Beta style of management are still seen in a positive light, female Beta managers aren’t considered at all—because Beta women can’t be managers. But why are we so unwilling to compare the relative merits of different personality types in female managers?

[…] our view of what a good leader looks like is limited, which can leave women feeling boxed in.

“Because, actually, if you’re looking at this volatile, complex, ambiguous world, where everything is so unpredictable, the only thing you can do is work on yourself and your own resilience to be able to cope and keep up and roll with the punches.”

How do you show the world how Alpha you are? You talk a lot and criticize everyone else. It’s a ruse as old as time (probably) and, often, it works. Most people are busy dealing with their own stuff, so they tend to assume that if people are busy dealing with their own stuff, so they tend to assume that if someone is vocal, self-assured, and sounds knowledgeable (read: has a loud voice), they must know what they’re talking about.

It’s hard to realize when you’re in an office environment that has a steep, sometimes toxic hierarchy how much time people spend trying to shore up their own positions, rather than focusing on the task at hand. When you grasp that the vast majority of office interactions are nothing to do with you, it can feel incredibly freeing.

And always remember the golden rule of office politics, which will stand you in good stead through most work crises: it’s not you, it’s them.

You just know as a black girl that you’re not allowed to be outspoken, you just know. When I had my first job, I worked for a magazine and I learned very quickly that the girls that were my age who were white were allowed to speak out. But when I did the same, there would be a throwaway comment like, ‘You don’t need to have that attitude.’ That was when I was twenty-one and I just learned very quickly that I’m not allowed to have the same sort of opinion as my white female counterparts.”

Ratings 3/5

Author

Rebecca Holman

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Rebecca Holman

Meet the author #author #biography #book #books #bookreviews #leadership journeytoleadershipblog.comRebecca Holman is the editorial director of Grazia online in the UK.

Rebecca Holman is also the author of Quiet Girls Can Run the World : Owning Your Power When You’re Not the “Alpha” in the Room.

6 Success Strategies Of Highly Powerful Leaders

Powerful leaders remain in communication with their authentic self, are honest with themselves, reveal their true abilities and have developed their personal power.

They are confident enough to have achieved success on their own terms.

Wondering which strategies are mostly used by powerful leaders to achieve success?

6 Strategies Of Highly Powerful Leaders #power #leadership #success #personalpower #journeytoleadership journeytoleadershipblog.com

Strategy 1: Powerful leaders set intentions

Powerful leaders decide what they want even if they don’t know how to get it.

Then, they do whatever it takes to get it.

Basically, they declare their intentions and commit to them.

To set the best intentions possible, they get to know themselves and learn to deal with their strengths and weaknesses.

Strategy 2: Powerful leaders take risks

To achieve success, powerful leaders tend to let go of what is safe and familiar.

They learn that they have to give up the good for the great and chose what is right for them along the way.

Strategy 3: Powerful leaders focus on winning

At some point, powerful leaders take risks, play the game and play to win.

They focus on winning no matter what.

Strategy 4: Powerful leaders speak up

Powerful leaders speak up for themselves when something goes wrong or something is bothering them.

Speaking allows them not to play victim.

Unfortunately, in modern society, women who speak up still hold a negative connotation. Most of the time, outspoken women are seen as bitchy and are punished for speaking up. Whereas outspoken men are seen as assertive, direct and forceful.

Strategy 5: Powerful leaders stretch their abilities

Powerful leaders don’t stop at what is doable or at what they think they are capable of.

In addition, they take risks, stretch themselves, feel the fear but go after their goals anyway.

Consequently, they often bite off more than they can chew but still manage to succeed.

Strategy 6: Powerful leaders seek support

Powerful leaders surround themselves with people who can individually and collectively believe in their abilities, who can guide them, and who can show them how to succeed.

Last Words Of Advice!

Powerful leaders don’t wait for opportunities to come their way, they create them.
Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

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Secrets Of Six Figure Women: Up Your Earnings and Change Your Life By Barbara Stanny

Although, most women remain underpaid and make 50% to 80% of what men make, more and more women are earning high salaries.

Women who underearn operate below their potential, have negative beliefs about money, work more for less pay without making the “conscious choice to live with less”.

The reality is that underearning affects your self-confidence, breaks down your lifestyle and limit your opportunities.

To start earning more and to make the right decisions, women need to change the way they think about themselves and their relationship with money.

SECRET 1 “Financial Success Is Possible in Almost Any Field, and Lack of Education Doesn’t Have to Hold You Back.”

Six-Figure women get credentials and go for the highest level of education they can possibly get.

However, they don’t let credentials stop them from achieving success.

SECRET 2 “Working Hard Doesn’t Mean Working All the Time.”

Six-Figure women take pleasure in their work and they work smart.

At the very least, they find jobs that are stimulating and fulfilling.

SECRET 3 “Focus on Fulfilling Your Values Rather Than Financial Gain.”

Women feel that they have to overwork themselves, stay longer hours than their male counterparts in order to attain their ambitions or to compete with men.

However, that lifestyle is not sustainable. High earning women look for signs of fatigue, burnout, a way to get more done in less time, to up their focus and for a way to balance their personal and professional life.

SECRET 4 “Loving What You Do Is Much More Important Than What You Do.”

The put their visions and values before financial gain.

Moreover, they want to live on their own terms.

Focusing on making money only creates an internal void that could never be filled.

SECRET 5 “Feel the Fear. Have the Doubts. Go for It Anyway.”

They are confident and believe in themselves.

They believe that they can do anything they set their minds to.

Of course, they struggle with self-doubt and fears but they somehow manage to overcome those fears or to fake it until they make it.

SECRET 6 “Think in Terms of Trade-offs, Not Sacrifices, to Find a Workable Equilibrium.”

Six-Figure women deal gracefully with social injustices.

They have figure out ways to deal with biases, injustices, racism and sexism with their sense of humor.

SECRET 7 “Sometimes You Just Have to Shrug It Off and Have a Good Laugh.”

They are grateful for what they have and how far they have come.

SECRET 8 “Appreciate Abundance.”

Six-Figure women are not victim of their circumstances.

They refuse to be beaten down or depressed for extended periods of time. Instead, they remain positive and optimistic against all odds.

Review

Secrets Of Six Figure Women: Up Your Earnings and Change Your Life by Barbara Stanny identifies the secrets of six-figure women, understand the traits and the principles that these women live by, so that we can apply these principles to our personal lives.

Secrets Of Six Figure Women: Up Your Earnings and Change Your Life helps you grow internally, expand your mindset, remove self-limiting beliefs, become self-aware, become financially aware and boost your income.

Furthermore, Barbara Stanny aims to shift the mindset from overcoming obstacles to finding in opportunities to increasing your earnings.

She shifts the focus from wage gap to wage gain, from lack to abundance.

Barbara Stanny, a new aged woman with a lot of questions when it comes to the process of women earning six figures, interviews and introduces us to the mindset of high powered and high earning women from all professional background.

I enjoyed the fact that she gave easy and achievable steps into earning more.

I also appreciated that Barbara Stanny tackled the fact that almost every woman and monorities experience the same hardships in the workplace.

Unfortunately, in 2020, not much has changed in corporate. Racism and sexism are still present in most organizations.

Do you have the same experience at home or in the workplace? Has earning a high income created any backlash at home or in The workplace?

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Was holding a high-paying job even worth what I imagined it would entail? Did six-figure women have to work absurdly long hours, forfeit their femininity, forgo their happiness, give up all semblance of a personal life? Did their marriages hold up? Did their children suffer? Did they bear lasting scars from breaking glass ceilings or battling gender bias? Was it possible for anyone to become a high earner? Could I?

What if we shifted the spotlight from women’s plight to women’s progress? What if we turned our attention from what’s wrong with the system and instead analyzed what’s working for those who are succeeding? We’re not ignoring the problem; we’re merely shifting our perspective.

Lawyer Tracy Preston told me the same thing. “If I internalized every time someone said something racist or sexist I wouldn’t be able to function. There’s always some incident that’ll be jarring, but I recognize it’s people’s ignorance. How do I deal with it? As they say, being black in America isn’t easy, so you have to have a sense of humor. Otherwise you’d go crazy.”

Like it or not, money affects virtually every area of your life. Lack of it leads to dependency and hardship. It can limit your access to health care and lifestyle choices. It can keep you in an unhappy marriage and an unsatisfying job. It perpetuates the cycle of poverty and debt, of discontent and chronic stress.

Our state of mind, however, often resembles a rearview mirror. We head toward the future seeing only the images from our past, and then wonder why nothing ever changes. I once heard insanity defined as doing the same thing over and over and expecting it to be different. Given that definition, I can safely say underearning is a form of financial insanity.

The real work in raising the bar is to stop doing the same old thing you’ve always done, to try out new strategies, to ignore false alarms, to resist the urge to quit, and to refuse to fall back into familiar terrain. The ability to tolerate discomfort—doing what might not feel good, but doing it anyway—is the only way you’ll ever complete the path to financial success. It helps to keep in mind that the discomfort is temporary, but the payoff is extraordinary.

You must let go of where you are to get to where you want to go.

men got high marks from their bosses when they were forceful and assertive, but women were downgraded for displaying the same qualities. To be quite candid, the double standard is alive and kicking—assertive men are respected, assertive women are resented.

Ratings 4.5/5

About the author

Barbara Stanny

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Barbara Stanny

Barbara Stanny is financial therapist and wealth coach.

Barbara Stanny is also the author of Secrets Of Six-Figure Women : Up Your Earnings and Change Your Life.

5 Great Examples Of Women In Leadership

There are a few women in positions of power but those few have been selfless, have created movements, and have tremendously impacted History.

These women have had different stories and have impacted society differently but they all created movements, have faced adversity, and broken the traditional rules of a male-dominated society.

Indeed, these women were not afraid of thinking or acting differently, being catalysts for change, bringing distinct perspectives and leadership styles to the table.

They have proven, more than necessary, that leadership has nothing to do with gender.

Wondering who are these women and how have they impacted History?

5 Great Examples Of Women In Leadership #Women #HowWomenRise #WomenInLeadership #leadership #leadershipdevelopment #realstories https://journeytoleadershipblog.com

In no particular order of importance, you will find below a short profile of 5 remarkable women, promoting change around the world.

1. Michelle Obama

Michelle Obama is a Princeton graduate, lawyer and writer of Becoming.

Michelle Obama is also the wife of the 44th President Of The United States Barack Obama. She is the first Black First Lady Of The United States.

Throughout the presidency of the 44th President, Michelle Obama wrote and gave several heartfelt speeches. She initiated several campaigns against Youth obesity with the Let’s Move! Movement in 2010 and acted for the Red Cross in Haiti in 2010.

Her latest speech at the 2020 Democratic National Convention revolutionized the role of the First Ladies in the White House and have demonstrated her level of influence.

2. Patrisse Cullors, Alicia Garza & Opal Tometi

Patrisse Cullors, Alicia Garza & Opal Tometi were all involved in social works when they came together to create the Black Lives Matter Movement.

After the unwarranted death of Trayvon Martin in 2012 and the acquittal of George Zimmerman, Patrisse Cullors, Alicia Garza & Opal Tometi wanted to give people the tools to fight for human rights, black rights and to generate change.

The Black Lives Matter Movement campaigns against systemic racism, injustice and violence inflicted on Black People. This movement also militates against police brutality, against the lack of empathy and accountability of the American oppressive system.

3. Tanaka Burke

Tarana Burke is an activist and founder of Just Be Inc., focusing on the health and well-being of young women of color.

Tanaka Burke created the nonprofit organization Just Be Inc. to help women to speak up and stand up for themselves. From there, she started the Me Too Movement to help women victims of sexual harassment and assault.

The phrase Me Too took on a broader meaning after the H. Weinstein cases in Hollywood.

With the phrase Me Too, women around the world have been able to share their stories and tell others that they are not alone.

4. Angela Merkel

Angela Merkel is the Chancellor of Germany and Forbes 2020 most powerful woman in the world.

Throughout her political career, Angela Merkel has adopted an analytical, quiet and confident leadership style.

Angela Merkel has commanded respect for several years for her ability to run a healthy economy and to render Germany competitive.

5. Margaret Thatcher

Margaret Thatcher, also known as the Iron Lady, is Britain’s first Prime Minister.

Margaret Thatcher served her country from 1979 to 1990 and introduced the United Kingdom to her conservative politics.

Her strong opinions generated both hate and admiration among her peers.

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Last Words Of Advice!

Despite efforts to maintain the status quo and biases keeping women and minorities out of certain spheres of influence, women are rapidly climbing the leadership ladder.

 

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

 

 

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