Best Self: Be You, Only Better By Mike Bayer

In Best Self: Be You, Only Better, Mike Bayer encourages people to be their Best Self.

What is your Best Self?

Your Best Self is unique, positive, evolved and aligned with your truth.

When you are being your best self, you are being your most authentic and at your core.

Best Self: Be You, Only Better By Mike Bayer #books #bookreview #selfesteem #selfimprovement #leader #leadership #selfdevelopment #lifecoaching #lifecoach

How to connect with your Best Self?

Connecting with your Best Self takes time and requires patience. To get in touch with your Best Self:

  • Express gratitude frequently to get out of a negative space. Make a gratitude list of everything that puts you in a good mood or elevates you in any kind of way.
  • Embrace change. Everybody can change if they want to, they just have to apply the right motivations.
  • Identify your fears. Once you have identified your fears, put them to the test to see if your assumptions are true, if they are rational, if they help you succeed, or if they serve your best interests.
  • Recognize any signs of egotistical behavior. Once you have acknowledge your behavior, assess the origins of it and get your ego in check.

Assessing your Best Self

“SPHERES stands for Social life, Personal life, Health, Education, Relationships, Employment, and Spiritual life”.

The SPHERES tool, create by Mike Bayer, is a screening tool used to assess your Best Self in all areas of your life.

Your social life 

In the SPHERES tool, your social situation determines how well you project your Best Self to the world.

It then becomes imperative to analyze how you interact with people. You can also assess your ability to send clear messages, to listen to others, to embrace human emotions, to handle highly charged situations, to give and receive feedback.

Your personal life

Your personal life contains your self-image, your self-talk, the level of compassion and respect you have for yourself.

To create the personal life that you want, you will have to:

  • Rewire your brain to think positively by challenging your internal dialogue.
  • Get familiar with what you are constantly telling yourself.
  • Identify the messages you tell yourself when you are under pressure.
  • Log your thoughts and your self-talk, identify the common themes and tones.
  • Be compassionate with yourself. Take care of yourself and monitor your stress levels before they snowball. If you take care of yourself, you will definitely be able to take care of others.
  • Connect with your passions. Your passions will vary throughout your life. Your passions will allow you to express yourself, to strengthen your bond with your Best Self and vibrate at a higher frequency. To find your passions, explore new things, challenge yourself and get out of your comfort zone.

Your health

Prioritizing your well-being allows you to be present, keep a clear mind and achieve your Best Self.

Your education

Remaining in a “lifetime learning mode” will help you evolve into your Best Self and become more self-aware.

Once you find your passions, you will take pleasure in acquiring knowledge in that field.

Your relationships

Your relationships reflect who you are as a person.

Your Best Self will gauge who you want to be around, judge the health of a relationship and help you make the tough decisions.

In order to stay connected to your Best Self in all relationships, you must define your core values, exercise them and identify the people who live up to them.

Your employment

We spend most of our days at work.

So, when we are not able to fully be ourselves, our work life tends to become draining.

It somehow becomes important to nurture our Best Selves at work or create a career path that allows us to maximize our potential at work.

Review

In Best Self: Be You, Only Better, Mike Bayer shares tips and tools to help you achieve your Best Self. He helps you make a diagnostic of all the aspects of your life and provides practical solutions to your problems.

Furthermore, Best Self: Be You, Only Better is a workbook that teaches you how to fix what’s inside to fix outside. It is on point when it comes to assessing people’s behavior and can conveniently be revisited several time in your life.

Best Self: Be You, Only Better is ideal for leaders who want to improve their leadership skills and bring their best selves at work. It becomes clear that if you are your best self, you can create the best teams, take care of others and create the best organization.

With this workbook:

  • Get in touch with your Best Self.
  • Reach your highest potential.
  • Find more balance in your life.
  • Evolve, change, reinvent yourself and improve your life.
  • Learn to handle adversity and crisis.
  • Discover your truth and your purpose.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Many of society’s “rules” simply don’t apply to us as individuals, and if we spend all our energy on trying to be, do, say, and act like society wants us to, we are simply wasting time we could be spending on discovering and connecting with our Best Self.

Self-care is foundational to living your ideal life.

Ratings 4/5

Author

Mike Bayer

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Mike Bayer

MEET THE AUTHOR

Mike Bayer is a professional personal development coach, CEO and founder of CAST Centers. Mike Bayer is also the author of Best Self: Be You, Only Better.

23 Things Leaders Need To Stop Doing Right Now

The best leaders are authenticself-disciplined and self-aware.

They know their strengths, weaknesses and limitations. 

They are honest with themselves and realize when they have harbored behaviors that need to be changed.

Wondering what are the things that you need to stop doing immediately?

23 Things Leaders Need To Stop Doing Right Now

#1. Stop depending on people for your self worth

Depending on people for your self-worth is risky because the people who build you up can also break you down.

To find your self-worth, you must stop comparing yourself to others, accept your unique distinctions, discover your abilities, auto-evaluate your role and contributions at work.

#2. Stop trying to be the center of attention

Leaders who place themselves at the center of attention take credit for their employees work, want to appear bigger than they really are, overestimate their contribution.

#3. Stop trying to be liked by everybody

If everybody likes you, you are either a person pleaser, a doormat or delusional.

#4. Stop being overly emotions

Emotions give us insight into our subconscious.

They are valuable tool to understand ourselves but they need to be controlled in order to lead and make the best decisions.

#5. Stop encouraging aggressive office politics

Toxic leaders turn their workplace into the hunger games for their own environment.

Workers then become unproductive and pay more attention to the drama than results and quality of work.

#6. Stop creating unreachable goals

Unreachable goals put unnecessary pressure on your employees.

Not every employee knows how to handle their stress. They most likely will end up getting distracted, lashing out at others or underperforming.

#7. Stop over processing everything

Leaders create processes that overwhelm their employees and that take time.

Deconstructing some processes help employees get their job done faster.

#8. Stop scheduling meetings just to do meetings

We have all been on a job where we go through pointless and endless meetings.

We come out those meetings drained, confused and filled with useless information.

#9. Stop the lack of transparency

It’s OK to change opinions or come through with mew decisions.

The only thing, you have to speak the truth, to be transparent, share when and why your opinions and decisions have changed.

#10. Stop amplifying internal conflicts

Conflicts are inevitable in the workplace.

You work with people who were raised differently and who have different sets of values.

However, internal conflicts create distractions, drama and not results.

It is best to shut down internal conflicts and focus on the real work issues.

#11. Stop micromanaging your team

Micromanaging leaders need to stay in control at all times.

They believe that they get things done better on their own and have a hard time delegating.

They just cannot control everything.

#12. Stop spreading yourself too thin

As a leader, you want to know everything and be everywhere at once.

You engage in so many projects that you don’t have the time to breathe of enjoy them.

The reality is that you cannot participate in everything because you will end up underperforming.

If you want to mater everything, you will master none. Stop saying yes to everything.

#13. Stop passing judgement

By passing judgement, you place yourself above other people and you push them away.

#14. Stop trying to win

Some leaders want to compete with their employees and win at all cost.

They want to be better at everything.

The reality is that they force their employees to dull themselves down, to downplay their achievements and to avoid speaking up when things go wrong.

#15. Stop showing off your intellect

Some leaders feel the need to express how smart they are and how much they know, even if they don’t.

#16. Stop neglecting your relationships

You have to make time for your employees and those you value.

Taking care of your relationships create employee engagement and alignment.

#17. Stop obsessing over results

When you obsess over results you forget to:

  • observe the bigger picture,
  • nurture your core values and character,
  • pay attention to those who drive your business.

#18. Stop overworking yourself

Leaders are constantly under pressure over long periods of time.

To combat that pressure, some leaders micromanage, spread themselves thin, arrive early and stay late.

If they don’t nurture a healthy work life balance, they can easily break down and burn out.

#19. Stop quitting

Perseverance is key and giving up too soon will cause you to miss out on success.

Besides, quitting when things get tough will demoralize your team ad damage your self-esteem.

#20. Stop procrastinating

Procrastination is the action of putting off an important yet unpleasant task.

It is avoiding pain and pushing it back for later, it is neither starting nor completing a task.

However, a leader has no room for procrastination.

Leaders who procrastinate are ineffective, unproductive and unaware of their own abilities.

#21. Stop sandbagging your employees

Place your employees in positions where they can maximize their potential.

#22. Stop being negative

Negativity is contagious and hard to get rid of in the workplace.

Negative leaders don’t motivate their team and find problems to every solutions.

#23. Stop acting alone

Leaders make decisions alone but they need their team to bring their visions to life.

They don’t need to act alone if they surround themselves with the right people.

Last Words Of Advice!

As a leader, you are role models to their employees.

You have to constantly be careful of the behaviors that you demonstrate and that you want to perpetuate.

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

 

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The Importance Of Assertive Leadership | 9 Truths Of Assertive Leaders

Being assertive is difficult to some people.

Indeed, women – especially minorities – have the hardest time being assertive in the workplace.

Depending on society’s norms, corporate culture, personal fears, gender or ethnical background, being assertive can be perceived as being aggressive, bossy or disrespectful.

Wondering how to become a more assertive leader?

The Importance Of Assertive Leadership | 9 Truths Of Assertive Leaders

What is assertiveness?

Assertiveness is a useful communication style that helps people create a well balanced life and relate to people easily.

With this communication style, assertive leaders acknowledge the importance of their thoughts and opinions, honestly express their thoughts and opinions, understand that their behavior – and theirs only – is within their control.

The benefits of assertive leadership?

The corporate world talks about confidence in leadership more that we talk about assertiveness.

Assertive leadership is being able to take a position, speak up and speak your mind. Assertive leaders:

  • Have control over their lives.
  • Have clear boundaries.
  • Have great relationships.
  • Listen to the needs of others.
  • Choose to fulfill the need of others.
  • Have respect for themselves and for others.
  • Get respect from their coworkers.
  • Are serene and are unafraid of conflicts.
  • Don’t try to people please or to seek outside validation.
  • Are able to calmly and honestly express their needs and wants.

Being assertive is a skill that takes time to harness.

Assertiveness cannot be obtained overnight. It takes practice, self-awareness, self-love and self-respect.

Assertive leaders stand by several truths, that they apply on a daily basis.

Truth #1. Everybody has an opinion

Assertive leaders understand that everybody has an opinion that they are entitled to.

They know that they are entitled to their own opinions and that their opinions have value.

They don’t have to apologize for their opinion. Instead, they own them.

They don’t let outside opinion define them and they can agree to disagree.

Truth #2. Self-awareness is key

Assertive leaders are self-aware, understand that they matter and their opinion has value.

Assertive leaders believe that their feelings, emotions and opinions are valid and important.

Their thoughts and decisions are their own even when they don’t make sense.

They have disciplined their emotions and can assess every situation that they go through.

Truth #3. Building confidence

Assertive leaders are confident about their abilities and nurture their self-esteem.

It is the belief in our abilities to perform, to get results from our performance, in our worth and in our opinion of ourselves.

In addition, they are attentive to their needs and wants.

They do not seek the approval of others.

They know their strengths, weaknesses and limitations.

Truth #4. Being authentic

Assertive leaders are authentic and are honest with themselves.

Assertive leaders express who they truly are and what they really feel.

Moreover, people are able to freely express themselves around assertive leaders.

Truth #5. Walking with integrity

Assertive leaders act with integrity.

They are walking and talking role models.

When they speak, they mean what they say and say what they mean.

Truth #6. Take back control

Assertive leaders are in control.

They have control over their lives, their emotions and their behavior.

They take risks, take responsibility for their actions and don’t try to solve others people problem for them.

Furthermore, they seek to influence but not to control or manipulate.

Truth #7. Failure is a stepping stone

Assertive leaders are unafraid of failure.

They understand that everybody makes mistakes all the time.

They see failure as a stepping stone to success. Mistakes don’t mean that they are not in control or that the rest of their decisions will be mistakes.

Needless to say, they don’t let their failures define them.

Truth #8. No is an answer

Assertive leaders will politely and respectfully retain the right to say no.

They say no without feeling the need to justify themselves.

They don’t have to accept every opportunity that is brought up to you.

Just remember there are different ways to say no.

Truth #9. Conflict is inevitable

Assertive leaders stand up for themselves and don’t avoid conflict because conflict is inevitable.

Assertive leaders speak up when things go wrong, when a topic has deep meaning to them.

They pick their battles. They don’t have to go around looking for fights, sharing their unwanted opinion and overpowering the opinions of others.

They listen before they speak and don’t minimize divergent opinions.

However, they are unafraid of hurting people’s feelings, of making people uncomfortable or emotional.

Last Words Of Advice!

People are not assertive because they fear judgement, rejection, conflict, challenging the status quo etc…

If you cannot be assertive in a moment, save face by:

  • Requiring some time to think, to reconsider, to schedule a response.
  • Practicing what you have to say in the mirror with the proper voice tone.
  • Trying to write down what you want to say.
  • Making an assertion and not explaining yourself.
  • Communicating clearly, honestly and directly.

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

14 Traits Of Highly Successful Leaders

You do not have to be famous, be a millionaire or own a company in the Fortune 500 to be a successful leader.

A successful leader runs a successful business with a healthy return on investment with the help of a successful team.

A successful leader is able to mentally, emotionally, physically and financially provide for his or her team.
Wondering what are the main traits a successful leader?

14 Traits Of Highly Successful Leaders

To become a successful leader, there are a few traits that you need to develop.

The traits of succesful leaders can be acquired anytime in life.

However, it is up to you to maintain them. It will also require a lot of self-discipline, self-motivation and self-awareness.

Trait #1. Successful leaders lead a healthy lifestyle

First and foremost, successful leaders are morning people.

They get a good night sleep.

They wake up early in the morning.

They choose to rise with the sun because it gives them time to think, to meditate, to plan their day.

Furthermore, they eat well and on time.

them, they exercise early in the morning to maintain their physical health, and to get rid of lingering negativity.

Trait #2. Successful leaders have strong conviction

They have the conviction that they are successful and that they will succeed no matter what.

Their conviction comes from their self-awareness, drive, purpose and their strong core values.

They have integrity and hold on to their principles.

They know that they can accomplish anything that they set their mind to.

They rely on their intuition, make their own opinion and don’t follow anyone.

Trait #3. Successful leaders manage their time effectively

They know how to manage their time and prioritize their tasks.

They are willing to handle the most difficult, most important and the most urgent first.

They say no to things that don’t matter to them or to things that don’t fit into the bigger picture.

Trait #4. Successful leaders value solitude

They regularly spend time alone to reflect and to get work done.

Trait #5. Successful leaders own up to their mistake

Indeed, they make mistakes.

They can admit when they have done wrong and can apologize for it.

They reward themselves for their successes and above all learn from their failures.

Trait #6. Successful leaders take calculated risks

They take risks, get out of their comfort zones, recognize what works and what doesn’t.

Trait #7. Successful leaders ask for feedback

They ask for feedback, actively listen to it, and if the feedback is sound, seek to apply it.

Trait #8. Successful leaders set boundaries

They have set clear boundaries in their mind early on.

They know what they need, want, wish for.

They also know what they will not allow or stand for.

They know how to say no and stand their ground.

Trait #9. Successful leaders obsess positively

Leaders spend their time obsessing positively.

By “obsessing positively”, I mean they are passionate and they can focus their attention on their goals for a prolonged amount of time.

Basically, they eat, drink, sleep, think their goals.

Trait #10. Successful leaders have a healthy work life balance

Even though they can obsess over their professional goals, they make time for a personal life.

They make sure to maintain a healthy work life balance.

Trait #11. Successful leaders are optimistic

They are grateful for what they have but are not complacent.

They do not dwell on negativity and CHOOSE to focus on positivity.

They don’t overthink or overanalyze everything.

They don’t play the victim and take responsibility for their actions.

They handle change, failures and pressure gracefully.

They see challenges as an opportunity to learn and they maintain a positive attitude in adversity.

Trait #12. Successful leaders are whole

Their self-esteem does not depend on what others think of them.

They don’t compare their lives with the ones of other people.

They don’t judge but empathize with other people.

They don’t insult but compliment people.

They don’t abuse their authority or power.

They don’t hug the spotlight but give credit when credit is due.

They do not need to harm someone else to feel superior or to feel whole.

They know who, how and when to forgive.

Moreover, they want to see others succeed. They encourage others to grow, to succeed and reach their full potential.

Trait #13. Successful leaders are wise beyond their years

They have a deep understanding of life and of themselves.

They can assess a situation and its outcome before engaging in it.

They have identified their purpose early in life and every decision that they make can be justified.

Trait #14. Successful leaders are learning machines

They are open-minded.

They are always learning, always evolving and always growing.

They understand that learning is a never-ending process, no matter their age or status.

On the flip side, they constantly want to share their knowledge with the world.

Last Words Of Advice!

Successful people inspire and act as role models for others and for their own organization.

Therefore, be mindful of your actions and of your words.
Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

12 Signs Of A Toxic Leader

Unfortunately, we have all experienced toxic leadership at some point in our career.

Toxic workplaces and toxic leadership foster because the leader is either encouraging it, participating in it or ignoring it.

Toxic leaders are corrosive on the long run. They erode their employees confidence, motivation, productivity, trust, loyalty and respect.

Wondering if you are a toxic leader or are in the presence of one?

12 Signs Of A Toxic Leader

12 Signs Of A Toxic Leader

#1. Toxic leaders retain useful information

Knowledge is power and toxic leaders know that.

The longer they can keep you in the dark, the longer they have control over you and the longer they stay in power.

In fact, leaders who retain information are insecure and are afraid of being replaced.

#2. Toxic leaders abuse their power and authority

Any chance that they get, toxic leaders need to remind you that they are in power and that they have leverage (financial leverage most of the time) over you.

This type of leaders have huge egos, consider that their employees are subordinates, and do not care who they have to step over to get what they want.

#3. Toxic leaders micromanage their employees

They don’t give people the time or the space to do their job. Instead, they breath down people’s neck.

In fact, micromanaging leaders are counterproductive and create a stressful work environment.

Which, in turn, slows down team work and efficiency.

#4. Toxic leaders condone poor behavior

They accept poor behavior from their team as long as the team produces results.

For example, they would tolerate workplace bullying if it would bring their team closer together.

In turn, they use fear and diverse punishments to incentivize their team.

#5. Toxic leaders manipulate and play aggressive office politics

They play mind games, use information about you against you, love to manipulate and gas light their own team just to stay in power and to advance their career.

#6. Toxic leaders shift responsibility

They talk about accountability but when push comes to shoves they avoid taking responsibility for their actions.

Besides, when things are great, they take credit for your success. When things go bad, they question your abilities and your failures.

#7. Toxic leaders give orders and don’t expect feedback

For them, it is their way or the high way.

They expect you to follow orders whether that order is right or wrong, whether that order benefits them or not.

The truth is they think that they know best but they actually don’t.

#8. Toxic leaders lie for no reason

They backtrack, bend the rules, adjust procedures, make up stories and rumors to for their needs.

They do not care about the impact of their words and create a culture of distrust.

#9. Toxic leaders protect the status quo

They deeply believe in hierarchy.

They don’t promote change or push innovative ideas.

In addition, they are locked in a particular era, in a particular setting. They don’t wish to modernize or adapt to change.

#10. Toxic leaders are overly emotional

They dramatize everything, have a temper and haven’t got a hold of it.

Their mood usually fluctuates throughout the day.

As a result, their behavior makes people walk on eggshells around them.

#11. Toxic leaders are passive aggressive

Either they play nice to your face and stab you in the back.

Or, they hold their feelings in and act it out instead.

Passive aggressiveness is very difficult to deal with as they don’t offer you any type of resolve.

#12. Toxic leaders lack core values

These leaders are entitled and self-serving.

They do not care about people and put their own interest first, no matter what.

Last Words Of Advice!

Toxic leaders often scare away their best employees.

Toxic leaders are simply fooling themselves because they live in constant fear.

They are afraid of losing control, of losing power, of seeming inferior, of being replaceable…

Furthermore, they let their fear control them and influence their behavior.

It is not necessary for you to play into their hands:

  • Learn from your experiences, about yourself and your limits. You can always extract lessons from a negative experience.
  • Emotionally and physically discipline yourself. Don’t lose your cool. By loosing your cool, you are giving them power over you.
  • Don’t take things personally and don’t let their problems become yours. It’s not about you but it’s all about them.
  • Find emotional support outside of work.
  • Keep your dignity. Don’t let other people actions define your character.

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

Are You Feeling Like An Outsider At Work? — 17 Simple Tips To Turn Your Situation Around

On my last 9 to 5 job, I remember my manager complaining to me that I would no longer be part of the team because I am too different, I asked too many questions and I don’t act like them or watch the same TV shows that they do.

Now at the time, I thought I wasn’t getting it and that I was failing at adulting.

Clearly, if I wanted to be successful in life and in my career, I either had to fake it and drain myself, or I needed to find another path and distance myself from “them”.

The point is that most organizations want their employees to be different and have original skills.

However, the reality is that most workplaces adhere to group-thinking, and create outsiders by forcing them to suppress their individuality for conformity.

Wondering what are the benefits of being an outsider and how you can overcome that feeling?

Are You Feeling Like An Outsider At Work? — 17 Simple Tips To Turn Your Situation Around

What is an outsider?

An outsider is a person who doesn’t feel like they belong. At work, that feeling translates itself into:

  • Feeling unsuccessful. According to society, being a successful adult at work means being great at your job, understanding and applying social norms.
  • Being unable to join a group or to find someone who matches your values and principles to some extent.
  • Being unable to express yourself freely in meetings and around a group of people.
  • Being excluded out of meetings or out of group conversations. If you are perpetually being excluded and are subject to other workplace harassment, your workplace is toxic and you must consider your mental health first.

Why are you feeling the way you do?

We are social creatures. We crave that feeling of belonging to a group that will take care of us and that will cooperate for better chances of survival.

Therefore, to get things done, we feel like we must fit in, preserve our well-being and be liked. Furthermore, feeling like an outsider can stem from:

  • A lack of cultural sensitivity. It is easy to feel excluded when we don’t understand a culture or when we don’t feel understood because of the cultural barrier.
  • A lack of social skills, a lack of confidence, a shy, introverted or lone wolf personality. Basically, feeling like an outsider is a social conditioning.
  • Your negative thoughts. If you believe certain things about yourself then they will most likely come through.
  • Differences in core values. For example, if most of your workplace like to gossip and you don’t, then you will start to feel excluded.
  • Gender gap. 
  • Generational gap. Each generation perceives the world differently and challenges the previous one. In one generation, people are shaped by social trends, are programmed with thoughts, values, moral ethics, models, examples of success and the guidelines to succeed.

What are the benefits of being an outsider?

I was brought up with the conviction that different is good. I believe that there are several ways of doing one thing.

So, I would never be thrown off if someone would go about life in an unconventional way. If you’re feeling like an outsider, chances are you:

  • Possess untapped talents and unused skills. Your feeling of being an outsider disappears when you find a place where you can exercise your gifts.
  • Are aware that you are not maximizing your potential and you are not walking in your purpose.
  • Are creative, innovative, are a trailblazer and a leader. Indeed, most leaders are outsiders. They have unique gifts and a unique perception of the world.
  • Can monetize what makes you different.

How to handle being an outsider?

Feeling included at work leads to better health, stronger work performance and brides a positive work environment. However, if you feel like an outsider, you are not alone.

Indeed, the feeling of being an outsider is very common and is not something to be ashamed of. Some people hide it, others don’t front. What is the best approach?

To claim your difference and get the best out of work:

  1. Accept yourself and take pride in your difference.
  2. Be compassionate with yourself. Not because you don’t fit in that there is something wrong with you.
  3. Strengthen your own identity and find out more about your core values.
  4. Identify your strengths and weaknesses so you can better apply them.
  5. Figure out your goals, build a vision board and remain focus on your goals.
  6. Understand that you don’t need to fit in to be successful and don’t need to be one-dimensional to exist.
  7. Acknowledge that feeling like an outsider is not a permanent nor unique situation. You can be the most wonderful person on this planet and still feel like an outsider.
  8. Stop trying hard to fit in. The more you try, the more you feel drained, the more you will end up with the wrong crowd. You just have to be prepared for when the right opportunities and people come your way.
  9. Assess your behavior and your thoughts towards your situation. Then, document your situation. Are you new to the company? Are people enjoying your company? Are people including you? Are you reserved or standoffish? Do you like, respect or understand the people you work with?
  10. Give yourself the time and space to explore what works for you, what you like and what you don’t like. There is no right place for you. You have to create your own space and not settle for less.
  11. Express who you truly are from time to time and observe what happens next. You will either create or shut off opportunities.
  12. Fill your days with activities that you enjoy.
  13. Build a strong support system with people who accept you for who you are.
  14. Support people who think and act outside the box. People who think outside the box are usually creative and innovative.
  15. Don’t pay attention to what people say about you. Don’t let external circumstances define you.
  16. Stop people pleasing and seeking outside validation. Avoid adjusting your personality and your core values to please people. Instead, observe the social norms at work, see if you want to acquire these norms, and then adjust your communication style, your work style accordingly.
  17. Otherwise, prepare an exit strategy.

Last words of Advice!

Sometimes, we have acquired all the diploma, all the skills for a job and still feel like an outsider.

Remember that there are benefits in not fitting in, that you are not failing, that you can be a leader and create your own path, that if you are not liked or included then you can be respected.

I have found that becoming an expert in your field will help you feel like you belong and will help you gain in credibility.

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

You Are A Bad*ss: How To Stop Doubting Your Greatness And Start Living An Awesome Life By Jen Sincero

Jen Sincero wrote You Are A Bad*ss: How To Stop Doubting Your Greatness And Start Living An Awesome Life at a time when she needed help, wanted to change and to find a deeper purpose.

In her book, Jen Sincero shares a few concepts that will help you become a bad*ss. Which means, you will be able to:

  • Believe in your vision and manifest it.
  • Overcome your fears.
  • Be comfortable with your failures and not feel guilty about your current situation. You will come to the realization that you can do more with your life, that you are capable to do better, that you don’t have to wait for failure or for the perfect situation to get started.
  • Takes risks, live large and understand that you have nothing to lose.
  • Love and forgive yourself.

You Are A Bad*ss: How To Stop Doubting Your Greatness And Start Living An Awesome Life By Jen Sincero

The Mind Games You Play With Yourself

Parents, from the day you were born, pass down their beliefs to their children.

The truth is our subconscious mind, filled with beliefs from our childhood, rules our lives.

Unfortunately, those beliefs are limiting and false. However, we don’t know better when we are younger.

Besides, our conscious mind actively jump from one random thought to another, is not in full control of our lives. In fact, our subconscious mind and our conscious mind are constantly in conflict but the subconscious mind always win. To solve that conflict:

  • Become more aware of your subconscious beliefs.
  • Identify what is blocking you from the life you want to live.
  • Invite new positive beliefs into your life.

The Bad*Ass Concept For Purpose & Goal-Setting

Jen Sincero encourages us to believe that there are greater things out there, to get a deeper understanding of your spirituality, to set your goals, to activate the law of attraction and manifest what you want in life.

  • Believe what you want and it will come through.
  • Ask for what you want, act as if you have already received what you have asked for.
  • Keep your thoughts on your goals.
  • Manage your time appropriately. Get organized and stay organized.
  • Create a vision board.
  • Surround yourself with people who will help you become the person you aspire to be and who share your mentality.

How To Become A Bad*ss?

One moment we think we’re feeling fantastic, other times we are feeling real insecure. One must come to conclusion, see themselves the way they want to be, and look at themselves through the eyes of someone you admire.

Discovering your “bad*ssery” is all about finding out who you really are and living our best life. We must get in touch with our inner self, the person we were when we were born and love that person. To become a bad*ass:

  • Identify and appreciate your gifts and talents. Everyone is unique and has unique gifts.
  • Share your talents and gifts with the world. 
  • Rewire your brain with positive affirmations and replace negative thoughts with positive ones. At some point, you must choose to let go of wrong beliefs and of decisions that hold you back. To identify your fears and negative thoughts, when you are working, observe the type of thoughts when you suddenly stop, when you get discouraged.
  • Do activities that you enjoy.
  • Try new activities and get out your comfort zone.
  • Avoid self-deprecating humor and practice self-love.
  • Avoid comparing yourself to others. Watching someone go after their dream, after what they truly want can make others uncomfortable and trigger insecurities.
  • Forgive yourself for past and future mistakes. You must forgive yourself before you end up hurting yourself.
  • Stay in the present. Take example on animals and babies that are not concerned about the past or the future.
  • Don’t worry about what people think of you.
  • Be responsible for what you say or do.
  • Give more than you take.
  • Learn to be grateful for what you have and what has not yet manifested itself because gratitude trumps fear.
  • Trust your gut. Do what feels right and what interest you in the moment instead of thinking.
  • Always do your best. Your best doesn’t have to perfect.

Review

You Are A Bad*ss: How To Stop Doubting Your Greatness And Start Living An Awesome Life by Jen Sincero is an entertaining, motivational and thoughtful book that encourages you to live your best life and provides a guide map to do so.

You Are A Bad*ss: How To Stop Doubting Your Greatness And Start Living An Awesome Life is written for people who are looking to do better, be better and focus on the essentials. It is written for people who refuse to self-loathe, want to change and who want to manifest their purpose.

Furthermore, Jen Sincero makes some great points, is blunt in her delivery yet has an efficient message. She shares relatable topics such as love, purpose, relationship with money, career advancement and what you are willing to do to get ahead.

Matter of fact, her message is all common sense. However, most people are unaware of these principles, forget about them, and forget that what they need is already inside of them.

Jen Sincero keeps it real and positive throughout her book. She places great quotes at the beginning of every chapter and ends every chapter with a call to action to love yourself.

You Are A Bad*ss: How To Stop Doubting Your Greatness And Start Living An Awesome Life resembles the principles of The Four Agreements By Don Miguel Ruiz in every way.

What this book has to do with being a leader, you ask?

This book is detrimental to leadership and clarifying your principles and core values. Leadership is all about discovering your purpose, the power of your conviction, controlling your subconscious mind, appreciating your strengths and weaknesses.

Let us know what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

If you want to live a life you’ve never lived, you have to do things you’ve never done.

We would be wise to take more of our cues from the beasts and babies.

It’s not that the things and opportunities that we want in life don’t exist yet.
It’s that we’re not yet aware of their existence (or the fact that we can really have them).

You are a badass. You were one when you came screaming onto this planet and you are one now. The Universe wouldn’t have bothered with you otherwise. You can’t screw up so majorly that your badassery disappears. It is who you are. It’s who you always will be. It’s not up for negotiation.

We’re born knowing how to trust our instincts, how to breathe deeply, how to eat only when we’re hungry, how to not care about what anyone thinks of our singing voices, dance moves, or hairdos, we know how to play, create, and love without holding back. Then, as we grow and learn from the people around us, we replace many of these primal understandings with negative false beliefs, fear, shame, and self-doubt.

What you choose to focus on becomes your reality.

Ratings 4/5

Author

Jen Sincero