Quote Of The Week #102

Quote Of The Week #102 Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again. This time more intelligently. Henry Ford #quotes #lifequotes #leadershipquotes #motivationalquotes #inspirationalquotes #failure #success #resilience #adversity #JourneyToLeadership

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Mindset: The New Psychology of Success By Carol S. Dweck

According to Carol S. Dweck in Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, children are eager to learn and never worry about failing.

It is only when they grow up that they don’t want to look foolish, and start defining themselves by their failures and successes.

However, the most successful people don’t worry about failing and have developed a Growth Mindset.

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success By Carol S. Dweck #books #bookreviews #mindset #leadership #leadershipskills

What is a Growth Mindset?

Mindsets are just beliefs. They’re powerful beliefs, but they’re just something in your mind, and you can change your mind. - Carol S. Dweck Click To Tweet

The Growth Mindset can be applied to different areas of our lives.

Growth Mindset consists in converting your past failures into successes.

It shows us how to:

  • Love and cope with failures.
  • Turn failures into a learning experience.
  • Cultivate your intelligence and most skills through failures and perseverance.
  • Challenge and stretch yourself.
  • Do your best and put forth the effort where there needs to be.
  • Change the beliefs about yourself and identify your personal qualities.
  • Avoid a life of regrets.

On the other hand, the Fixed Mindset limits our achievements.

The Fixed Mindset has been instilled in us, unbeknownst to us, since our tender childhood.

When you don’t have a Growth Mindset, you tend to:

  • Show more depression.
  • Believe that you possess fixed traits.
  • Look for outside validation or for people who are worse off than you are.
  • Feel an urge to succeed and to prove yourself.

How leaders grow their mindset?

Fixed Mindset leaders only hire people who can boost their ego and make them feel superior. They use their company as a display of their superiority.

They tend to compare themselves to others, to become abusive and controlling, to pick on people who perform at their best.

  1. Monitor your surrounding and your thought patterns. Then, understand the implications and what you can learn from your experience.
  2. Learn to maintain a sense of confidence and devote yourself to growing.
  3. Make concrete plans that you can visualize.
  4. Understand that your plans will fail from time to time and that you will have to develop strategies to maintain your Growth Mindset.
  5. Don’t hide your mistakes and don’t be defensive about it.
  6. Take care of your people.
  7. Don’t allow groupthink and allow dissenting voices to speak up.
  8. Don’t feel threatened by high performing employees and help your employees improve on the job.
  9. Ask for feedback and for more information to learn.
  10. Stop beating yourself up when you have failed.
  11. Remember that everyday is an opportunity to learn.

Review

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol S. Dweck is a self-help book that encourages introspection and teaches us how to develop a “Growth Mindset”.

In Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, Carol S. Dweck shares poignant examples of people who have embraced the Growth Mindset, overcome challenges and achieved personal success.

In addition, Carol S. Dweck recaps all the ways we can be harboring a fixed mindset in our parenting, relationships and leadership.

She also asks significant questions to help us determine whether or not we have a Growth or Fixed Mindset.

I wish there were more detained and practical advice or a step by step guide on how to acquire a Growth Mindset.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

People may start with different temperaments and different aptitudes, but it is clear that experience, training, and personal effort take them the rest of the way.

Mindsets are just beliefs. They’re powerful beliefs, but they’re just something in your mind, and you can change your mind.

Even in the growth mindset, failure can be a painful experience. But it doesn’t define you. It’s a problem to be faced, dealt with, and learned from.

Real self-confidence is not reflected in a title, an expensive suit, a fancy car, or a series of acquisitions. It is reflected in your mindset: your readiness to grow.

Ratings 3.5/5

Author

Carol S. Dweck

 

8 Ways Great Leaders Deal With Disappointment

Recently, I have made solid plans around an opportunity that didn’t turn out. Thou I didn’t care much about the opportunity, I was frustrated that the plans that I carefully hatched fell through.

In order to find out why the opportunity fell off, I had a conversation with a toxic individual who spewed lies and venom and with whom I happened to get out of character.

Because I lost my plans for the future and gave away my personal power, I was deeply disappointed in myself and in the circumstances.

If you are a trailblazing leader, are goal-oriented or enjoy making plans for the future, these moments happen often and you will face a lot of disappointments in your life.

That is why, you simply have to learn to cope with it.

Wondering how leaders overcome disappointment in life?

8 Ways Great Leaders Deal With Disappointment #resilience #adversity #leadership #failure #success #selfesteem

The importance of disappointments

Disappointment is defined as feelings of sadness or displeasure caused by feelings of unfulfilled hope and failed expectations.

Sometimes, an opportunity that we wished for just doesn’t turn out; A person we are hoping for doesn’t show up or act right.

However, life never goes according to plans. Eventually, you will make new plans, you will realize that not every opportunity is a good opportunity and not everyone is good for you.

Feelings of disappointment are hard to get rid off at first but are ephemeral. Those feelings will go away with time.

Once you have overcome these feelings, you will finally understand who you truly are, you can grow as a person, become a stronger person, and build up your character.

How to overcome disappointment?

1. Accept your emotions

Disappointment is part of life and everyone will experience it at some point in life.

Disappointment can trigger a vast array of emotions that you cannot run away from or cover up.

It becomes critical to acknowledge your feelings and find out what exactly triggered it.

Refusing to analyze, confront and discipline your emotions can cause long-term damage on your health.

2. Forgive yourself

Learning to forgive yourself is the hardest part of dealing with disappointment because we are grasping our errors and what we “should” have done instead.

You are only human. You have made mistakes and you will probably make some more.

So, be compassionate with yourself, avoid shifting blame and take care of yourself. Eat well, sleep well and exercise.

3. Reframe your mindset

Now, that you have dealt with your raw emotions, it is time to restructure your mindset, improve on yourself, analyze your situation and mentally distance yourself from your past expectations.

This is the moment when you get comfortable with feeling uncomfortable, when you accept disappointment as a part of life and as a challenge, when you use it to improve yourself and to change the way you have been doing things.

While you are reframing your mindset:

  • Monitor your self-talk.
  • Don’t expect to be constantly disappointed because you attract what you think.
  • Practice self control to make better decisions, to nurture healthy thoughts because you are responsible for yourself.

4. Shift your focus

Now that you have reframed your mind, you have to trust that positivity can result from a negative situation and focus on turning your negative situation into a positive one.

The best way to keep moving forward and to making the best out of any situation is to  stay busy, positive, focused and on purpose, to focus on your strengths and on who you want to be.

You can also find out what you could have done differently and make your goals more achievable.

5. Stay present

Your disappointment happened in the past and it’s time to move on.

There is no sense in replaying a situation in your mind over and over again.

It becomes detrimental to your health to be present and be grateful for what you currently have.

If you cannot remain in the present and keep ruminating, it is best to quickly analyze your feelings until you get closure.

6. Surround yourself with positive people

Disappointment can turn into a burden that can be too heavy for one person.

It can be helpful to share your disappointment with people you trust and who care about you.

As a general notice:

  • Be careful who you surround yourself with.
  • Stay away from people who constantly disappoint you or who hurt you on purpose.

7. Let go control

In life, you must always remember that you cannot control everything that happens to you or around you.

Therefore, 

  • Don’t worry about the circumstances outside your control. It won’t change anything.
  • Trust that life has a better plan and solution for you.
  • Remember that there are many more opportunities out there.
  • Don’t get too attached to your plans and expectations.
  • Expect setbacks in life.

8. Grow!

Remember that life is a journey and that every failure brings you closer to your success.

We can learn something from every life experience, even from our disappointments.

Last Words Of Advice!

No matter the situation, always maintain your personal power.

There is no need to always throw yourself a pity party.

Once you have given yourself time to heal and when you get over your feelings of disappointment, you must think about what you could have done differently and implement the new solution the next time you face a similar situation.

Now that you know better, do better!

 

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

 

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Unbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level By Mark Divine

Unbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level by Mark Divine provides methods and strategies to:

  • Develop an unbeatable mind.
  • Deal with harsh realities.
  • Increase your personal power.
  • Improve your thought pattern and find your positive focus.
  • Master and outperform yourself.
  • Train your team.

An Unbeatable Mind?

A person with an unbeatable mind is always original, cultivates excellence, seeks to magnify his or her potential and hates mediocrity.

In addition, an unbeatable mind follows universal laws and truths, is resilient, has great character and leadership qualities.

Furthermore, an unbeatable mind avoids group-thinking, procrastination and inaction.

According to Divine, it is imperative that you gain mental control, acquire mental toughness and develop leadership qualities.

Unbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level By Mark Divine #books #bookreview

How to find your positive focus and gain mental control?

Spending time alone and in silence, quieting your mind is discouraged in Western society.

We are rarely, if ever, encouraged to spend time in silence or get to know the depth of our character. - Mark Divine Click To Tweet

People are therefore prone to negative thinking. However, negativity destroys performance and brings down your energy.

In order to find a positive focus and gain mental control:

  1. Be aware of your negativity. To become self-ware, practice silence, define your passion, principles and purpose.
  2. Prohibit the negative self-talk.
  3. Focus on positive self-talk or affirmations. Add positive imagery and feelings to those affirmations.
  4. Find a mantra or an affirmation that will run in the background of your mind.

How to gain mental toughness?

Mental toughness is sustaining positive focus on one task, on the one thing that keeps you going.

Mental toughness helps you concentrate on your tasks for long periods of time without any distractions.

To develop mental toughness:

  1. Practice concentration on a daily basis.
  2. Understand that your overall success depends on every single choice that you make.
  3. Acknowledge that the small choices lead you towards excellence and shape your life the most.
  4. Educate yourself on how stress works, how you react to it and learn to eliminate it from your life.

Develop the disciplines of a Warrior

According to Mark Divine, Warriors are those who have achieved mental control and mental toughness.

They have learnt to discipline their mind so they can focus on the things that matter most, maintain positive focus when they need it most, avoid being distracted by negative emotions and negative beliefs.

Since the Warrior is committed to mastering himself or herself, he or she has mastered the following disciplines:

  1. Simplicity. They have learnt to detach themselves from material things that they don’t need.
  2. Dedication. They apply themselves daily but don’t take themselves too seriously.
  3. Authenticity. They are honest with themselves.
  4. Service. They build up their character.

Warriors with unbeatable minds:

  • Develop a strong plan and discipline.
  • Commit daily to the plan.
  • Are mindful of their decisions.
  • Stay in the present moment.
  • Maintain their energy and their positive focus.
  • Fulfill their purpose.
  • Make change happen.
  • Step up their game and take action.
  • Lead themselves and work with an unbeatable team.
  • Do what is best for their team.
  • Align their team with their vision and purpose.

Review

Unbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level By Mark Divine #books #bookreviewUnbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level by Mark Divine is a great guide for being and maintaining positivity no matter what.

Mark Divine gives sound and practical advice, using his 20 years of experience as a Navy Seal.

Mark Divine applies what he learnt with the NAVY to his regular life and work. He teaches you how to:

  • Discipline yourself and manage your emotions.
  • Reject mediocrity.
  • Build up your resilience.
  • get the life and career you want.

Unbeatable Mind: Forge Resiliency and Mental Toughness to Succeed at an Elite Level is useful for leaders, corporate teams and all those who want to condition their mind, body and soul.

I definitively loved the military aspect, principles and parallels in the book. However, because of his experience, some of his analogies are extreme and unrelatable.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Consistency is the omnipotent force behind change.

We are rarely, if ever, encouraged to spend time in silence or get to know the depth of our character.

Negativity destroys performance in the short term and precludes success and happiness in the long term.

Lack of meaning and purpose is a major cause of despair and despondency in the world.

Ratings 4/5

Author

Mark Divine

Mark Divine

MEET THE AUTHORMark Divine  is a retired Navy SEAL Commander and founder of the leadership development program Unbeatable Mind.

Mark Divine is also the author of Unbeatable Mind.

The Obstacle is the Way : The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph by Ryan Holiday

Not everyone knows how to handle obstacles. Most people tend to quit at the sight of adversity.

Overcoming obstacles and standing tall in adversity are a learned behavior. To turn your trials into triumphs, you must:

  • Change our bad perceptions of events.
  • Take directive actions.
  • Strengthen your will power.

The Obstacle is the Way _ The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph by Ryan Holiday

Change your perception

Your perception has power over you and your decisions.

Building up your perception takes time and a lot of practice. You must discipline your emotions and objectively perceive your world for what it is and not for how it wants to be seen in order to :

  • Temper your passions and primal feelings,
  • Become objective and access the truth.
  • Stay cool under pressure.
  • Stay present and positive.

Your mind is a powerful tool. To actively change your perception:

  • Understand that you cannot change the obstacles.
  • Understand that you are in control of how you perceive the world and your obstacles.
  • Believe that you can choose how to respond to different situations. You can always oppose negativity or shake it off.
  • Trust that you are the one who decides of the outcome of the situation.
  • Assume that there are no good or bad events in life. By thinking so, you make it so.
  • Feel your emotions but get your emotions under control.
  • Tell yourself the truth and be authentic.
  • Use your personal resources wisely. For example, don’t waste your time trying to understand why a situation is the way it is. Those reasons don’t matter.
  • See obstacles as challenges or opportunities to observe, to grow, to improve yourself, to acquire new skills and to try new tactics.
  • Do not make assumptions.
  • Be present, be bold and take calculated risks.
Our perceptions can be a source of strength or of great weakness.-Ryan Holiday in The Obstacle is the Way : The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph. Click To Tweet

Take directive action

After you have corrected your perception, it is time to learn how to act it out.

Each and every one of your actions must serve a purpose.

To act towards your goals with your new perception:

  • Remember that where you start is not where you will end.
  • Start somewhere and fight to create momentum in whatever you undertake.
  • Take the time to explore and to learn.
  • Avoid complaining and take “directive action”. If you have taken action, persevere and don’t quit no matter what.
  • Expect the execution of your plan will be difficult.
  • See obstacles as a way to test your character.
  • Turn negatives into positives.
  • Do not dwell or waste time dwelling on the hand that life has dealt you.
  • Take responsibility for your actions.
  • Don’t let distractions or failed actions stop you. Instead, fail forward, learn from your failures and don’t take them personally.
  • Manage your energy and always do your best with what you have.

Increase your will power

Your will power is something that can never be taken from you.

Maintaining it requires a deep understanding of life.

To increase your will power:

Review

The Obstacle is the Way : The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph is a motivational book that encourages people to withstand adversity and to take action despite adversity.

Ryan Holiday shares a philosophical approach, rooted in stoicism, that will help you confront obstacles and turn them upside down.

The Obstacle is the Way : The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph is destined for leaders and entrepreneurs who:

  • Face challenges on a daily basis,
  • Need to make pragmatic decisions and take calculated risks,
  • Want to take their career or business to the next level.

Holiday‘s entire book is based on classical references, historical figures and war leaders, who have distinguished themselves in life and who have adopted stoicism as a life strategy.

Finally, Ryan Holiday also incorporates reputable leaders and entrepreneurs as examples of resilience and will power.

If you want to stay motivated and push through your challenges, this book is for you.

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

Our perceptions can be a source of strength or of great weakness. If we are emotional, subjective and shortsighted, we only add to our troubles.

Obstacles make us emotional, but the only way we’ll survive or overcome them is by keeping those emotions in check—if we can keep steady no matter what happens, no matter how much external events may fluctuate.

Focusing exclusively on what is in our power magnifies and enhances our power. But every ounce of energy directed at things we can’t actually influence is wasted—self-indulgent and self-destructive. So much power—ours, and other people’s—is frittered away in this manner.

If you mean it when you say you’re at the end of your rope and would rather quit, you actually have a unique chance to grow and improve yourself. A unique opportunity to experiment with different solutions, to try different tactics, or to take on new projects to add to your skill set.

Leadership requires determination and energy. And certain situations, at times, call on leaders to marshal that determined energy simply to endure.

Ratings 4/5

Author

Ryan Holiday

 

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Ryan Holiday

MEET THE AUTHOR

Ryan Holiday is a speaker, writer and media strategist. Ryan Holiday is also the author of The Obstacle is the Way : The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph.

7 Steps To Be A Positive Leader In Adversity

From workplace bullying to job loss, from an unsatisfied customer to a tough team, from company crisis to personal drama, adversity often catches us by surprise.

Indeed, we never see it coming. If you are a leader, you will definitely be subjected to it and will have to learn how to wear adversity like a badge of honor.

Wondering how to stay positive in the face of adversity?

7 Steps To Be A Positive Leader In Adversity

Why be positive?

Without adversity, we wouldn’t do, create anything or grow as people.

The most effective way to deal with adversity is to stop worrying, to maintain a positive and optimistic attitude.

People enjoy positive people and are most likely to help them. Positive people:

  • Are able to overcome adversity.
  • Are high performers.
  • Are most satisfied with their relationships.
  • Focus on the future and are resilient.
  • Focus on their strengths.
  • Have clear goals. They actively work towards their goals and understand that they can change the outcome of a situation.
  • Have control over their lives and see stress as a small bump in the road.
  • Know that their mood can be controlled.
  • Don’t waste their time and energy on drama.

When life puts you in tough situations, don’t say “why me”, say “try me”. Click To Tweet

There are a few strategies to keep your composure and maintain a sense of self.

#1. Assess the situation

Adverse situations are necessary and often come out of the blue.

Sometimes, the situation is not as bad as it seems.

The first step is to identify the origin of the situation and the possible outcomes.

Then, assess the criticality of the situation.

Finally, come up with different potential solutions to your problem.

#2. Change your mindset

Once, you have assessed the situation, it is detrimental to accept your reality, let go of the past and rework your perceptions of adversity.

You can tell yourself that there are always solutions to a problem, that your situation is not as bad as it seems, is only temporary, or can be an opportunity in disguise.

In addition, to change your mindset:

  1. Visualize yourself beyond your situation.
  2. Be grateful for what you have. There are people who are in worse situations than you are.
  3. Understand that your situation is temporary and that you are passing through and will come out safe.

#3. Gain control over your situation

Staying organized and focused will help you gain more control over your situation.

  1. Focus on what you can do and measure your progress.
  2. Write down your task for the day in order of importance so you can focus on it.
  3. Learn your job and become an expert in your field.
  4. Learn to say no without having to explain yourself. There are different ways to politely express refusal. “I’ll think about it”, “I’ll get back to you”, “I have a prior engagement”…

#4. Gain control over yourself

Adversity makes everything seems out of control and generates a lot of extreme emotions.

Keeping your composure requires a lot of emotional discipline. To do so, take care of your mind, body and soul.

Take care of body

Exercise to keep your confidence up and to quiet your mind.

Take care of your mental health

  1. Work on your mental health.
  2. Take time off and stay in a quiet place to meditate, to make peace with yourself, to cope with your problem, to sleep.
  3. Quickly identify your thought pattern.
  4. Express your facts, emotions and your adversity in writing.
  5. Write down your past achievements and what you did to overcome past obstacles as well.

#5. Keep your vision alive

To stay positive, you must keep your goals and your vision alive.

In doing so, remember your mission statement, your purpose and the reasons why you have joined the company.

#6. Maintain your sense of humor

Making fun of your problems can help you understand them and alleviate your load.

Maintaining your sense of humor in times of adversity is a conscious choice. To do so:

  • Have a good laugh and make fun of yourself.
  • Try to start your day with a smile on your face.
  • Look around and find things that will make you smile.
  • Be kind to other people, compliment them and put a smile on their face.
  • Give back to your team or to your community.

#7. Muster up a strong support system

Your relationships are what will get you through in hard times. That’s why you don’t have to shut yourself off and you must:

  • Surround yourself with successful and positive people.
  • Take the time to vent and talk things through with someone you trust.
  • Ensure that you make time for intimacy.

Last Words Of Advice!

It is important for you to know when it is time to move on.

Moving on doesn’t mean that you are weak or that you cannot handle yourself.

It simply means that you have control over your decisions, that value your health and sanity more than your job, that you understand life and are at peace with yourself.

Furthermore, remember that:

  1. You are only human.
  2. You are not the only one going through adversity.
  3. Your story can help someone overcome theirs.
  4. Your past mistakes don’t define who you are.
  5. You must not take your problems personally.

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.