They say, when you get to work, leave your feelings at the door.
I mean, that’s what they say…
In the workplace, most conflicts exist because of a gap in values.
Indeed, at work, you rub elbow with people who don’t necessary have the same values as you do.
Conflicts can simply result in one’s definition of work ethic or quality of work.
For instance, your feelings can easily be hurt by some people are less efficient and need extra hours, some are workahalics and do it for the love of work, some don’t care about the job or the work they put out…
In addition, your feelings can also be hurt by short deadlines or the way someone talk to you.
Leaders have different ways of getting out of these feelings.
1. They remember who they are
They don’t get lost in the drama of their feelings.
Instead, they separate themselves from their work.
Even if their feelings have been hurt at work, they separate their identity from their work.
2. They take responsibility
They realize that they are responsible only for themselves and for how they feel.
They acknowledge that they can only control of themselves.
3. They confront themselves and the situation
Confrontation always has the negative connotation of conflict, drama and unresolved issues.
However, confrontation can also be facing the situation head on and examining the situation for what it is.
You don’t necessarily have to go face to face with someone to solve an issue especially when we’re talking about values:
You may have to confront yourself and ask yourself why you are feeling these feelings.
You may have to assess the situation and ask yourself why is this situation triggering these emotions.
4. They stay on goal
One way leaders get out of their feelings is by having solid and clear goals that will keep them focused on something other than themselves.
5. They use humour
Leaders who have a sense of humour take life with a grain of salt and have a tendency to get out of their feelings faster than
6. They use affirmations
Words of affirmations remind people of who they are and who they want to be.
They remind leaders of the principles that they
Last Words Of Advice
Don’t forget to use your relationships, your hobbies, your favorite activities or exercise to help you shift your mindset.
Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!
Don’t forget to like, share, subscribe and leave a comment below.
We are often faced with stressful situations in our personal and professional lives…
Unfortunately, perception is reality.
That means that our perception of the situation will most of the time determines our reaction.
Shifting perception doesn’t mean switching viewpoint or distorting the truth but broadening your understanding of all facets of the situation.
Wondering how to shift your perspective?
Perception is a combination of the information collected, your experience and system of belief.
To shift it, there are some steps that you can take.
1. Put some distance between you and the drama
Sometimes, we get caught up in negative situations whether we want to or not or we stay in toxic environments longer than we should.
Removing yourself from that environment is the best way to change perspective.
If you are consistently surrounded by negative people, your thoughts will sooner or later become negative.
You may wonder whether you are creating or amplifying the negativity but if you remove yourself from it and it still goes on, you have nothing to do with it.
You probably just got caught up in someone else’s crazy.
2. Change your programming
You must be aware of the type of content that you allow to program your subconscious mind.
If you aren’t able to find the perspective you are looking for, seek out content that comforts you and that is similar to the perspective you wish to achieve or to the attitude you wish to emulate.
You may need to gather different sources of positivity around you like podcasts, books or movies.
3. Pay attention to self-talk
You are in control of your thoughts and of the way you react to situations.
In order to help your self-talk, you can use words of affirmation.
4. Adjust your expectations
Most drama in life comes from having too high expectations for people.
If someone has disappointed you or created unnecessary drama, you need to reset and lower your expectations for them.
5. Limit your time
If you are unable to physically remove yourself from drama, you can limit your time there while attempting to find a solution.
By doing so, you will gradually:
Prioritize the essentials.
Understand that everything is temporary.
Acknowledge that you don’t have to stay in it longer than necessary.
6. Find the lesson
Find the lesson and focus on the positives.
Finding the lesson in a negative situation allows you to look past yourself, to grow and to not be the victim.
7. Take a step back
Sometimes, we create our own drama or participate at some level in someone else’s.
According to Miguel Ruiz in The Four Agreements, taking someone else’s drama personally will only make things worse.
It then helps to take a step back to gather yourself and to evaluate the situation.
By doing so, you can also make sure that the story you tell yourself isn’t laced with elements of your past.
8. Change your reaction
You may no be able to shift your perspective just yet but you can change your reaction.
The truth is if you keep doing the same thing, you will keep getting the same result.
So, when faced with a situation that seems consistently challenging, try doing something different.
It may not solve the situation but you will get a different result and therefore gain more perspective.
9. See the bigger picture
Drama and the way we think about it can cause serious repercussions on your life.
Visualizing the bigger picture reframes the negative situation and reduces its impact.
Will this matter in the long run? In 5 days, 5 months or 5 years, will you remember this person or that job?
10. Forgive yourself
Staying in a negative situation, talking to negative people or walking around thinking about negative situation is damaging to your health and will only amplify the drama.
So, take the time to process the negative emotions, forgive yourself for staying in a bad situation for too long and hold on to the glimmer of hope.
Last Words Of Advice!
The circumstances of the situation you are dealing with depend on your perspective and your reaction.
Shifting perspective is a mind trick that allows you to better face challenges and that relies on the principal that you have the power to control your thoughts.
Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!
Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.
Strong leaders constantly evaluate themselves, check their emotional status, practice self-discipline and maintain their cool no matter what…
Leaders cannot overcome hurdles, make tough decisions and eventually experience positive events if they are not emotionally strong.
Wondering how to become an emotionally strong leader?
1. Understand that your emotions are useful
Your emotions are there to guide you through life and not superimpose over your life because life is more than your emotions. Of course, you have relationships you care about, a purpose in life, passions and goals.
Good or bad, positive or negative, your emotions are useful and shouldn’t control your life.
Being able to gain control over your emotions is all about recognizing which emotion you are dealing with, acquiring self-awareness, engaging in positive self-talk and forging positive habits.
2. Acknowledge that everybody has problems
Everybody has problems and is a part of life. You just have to face them sooner or later.
The truth is there isn’t a person in this world who is problem free. There are just some people who are able to handle them and others who aren’t.
Emotionally strong leaders are solution-oriented and understand that problems actually build character, experience, grit and stamina.
3. Learn from your failures
There is always a lesson that can be learnt from your failures.
That is why there is no need to dwell on the past, but mental muscles are built through adversity and more lessons are learnt from failures than from success.
4. Realize that your mind can adapt to just about anything
Whatever you are going through, however uncomfortable you may feel, emotionally strong leaders don’t run away from their problems.
After a while, you will grow, get out of your comfort zone and your mind will simply adjust to your circumstances.
Adaptable leaders know how to self-regulate, focus on the important things they can control and don’t focus on the drama.
5. Find your purpose
Your purpose is made of clear life goals that will motivate you, help you wake up in the morning and help you overcome adversity.
When emotionally strong leaders have found their purpose and their inner motivator, they are able to focus on the essentials, easily influence and motivate others.
Last Words Of Advice!
Give yourself the freedom to express your thoughts and emotions when you really want to.
Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!
Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.
Journey To Leadership is now hosting networking events…
In Living Forward: A Proven Plan to Stop Drifting and Get the Life You Want, Michael Hyatt & Daniel Harkavy suggest that we define a plan for our lives.
They introduce us to the concept of Life Planning and show us how to implement the process.
What is a Life Plan?
According to Hyatt and Harkavy, “A Life Plan is a short written document, usually five to fifteen pages long“.
The Life Plan is personal, describes your priorities, the steps to reach your goals and the legacy you want to leave.
It is a life long process, that can continually be adjusted and improved. A Life Plan doesn’t shield you from life challenges and failures. Instead, it will help you create intention for your life.
It is common to have a career plan but no Life Plan. The Life Plan enables you to:
Set priorities and stick to them.
Stop sacrificing yourself, to stop trading health and time for work, career advancement, accolades or money.
Filter out opportunities. As you get older and as you get experiences, opportunity coming your way will multiply. It is therefore important to know where your priorities lie and what opportunity to choose.
Avoid distractions, confront and deal with reality.
Avoid the feeling of being stuck and allow you to keep your eyes on the future.
Avoid regrets and increase your level of control.
The drift and its consequences
Most people drift away from their dreams because:
They are unaware that their ideas and assumptions are inaccurate and harmful.
There is a discrepancy between their beliefs and reality.
They are distracted, are spread too thin or too busy to focus on their lives and to start prioritizing.
They don’t understand that there is hope, that they can change and that they have more control over their lives than they think.
When you drift away from your dreams and when you don’t have a Life Plan, you tend to:
Lack meaning and purpose.
Waste your time and other valuable resources on meaningless tasks.
Lose opportunities and their sense of urgency. People who drift away procrastinate and are unable to discern a good opportunity from a bad.
Experience trouble more intensely because they are unprepared.
Take a passive approach to life, shift blame and live in regrets.
Designing and implementing your Life Plan
To design your Life Plan, it is necessary to outline your legacy, to set your priorities, get clarity on your objectives and to reserve one day to build your Life Plan.
Outlining your legacy
To design your Life Plan, keep in mind that everybody leaves a legacy, face your mortality and begin with the end in mind.
It is critical to write your Life Plan like you are writing your eulogy, to imagine how you want others to remember you and to stay committed to the process.
Setting your priorities
Getting more clarity on your objectives will definitely increase your commitment. To do so, you must steer clear from external expectations and do what is right for you.
Getting clarity on objectives
Identify your purpose.
Project yourself into the future, picture yourself in it and imagine all the different positive outcomes. To make your vision much more compelling, write down in the present tense what you hear, feel, see, smell and taste.
Find and apply a quote that inspires you.
Make an honest assessment of your current progress.
Commit to specific, measurable, actionable, realistic and time-bond goals.
Devote one day to your Life Plan
Hyatt & Harkavy recommend that you schedule one day to create your Life Plan. Needless to say, the Life plan should be implemented starting the next day.
It is necessary to allow yourself to dream, to not expect perfection and to not get distracted.
Implement your plan
Implementing the Life Plan is the most challenging part. It is necessary to:
Include your Life Plan in your everyday routine.
Fight the feeling of being overwhelmed by life’s drama.
Don’t be afraid to say no or to disappoint others.
Read your plan daily and review it often.
Review
Living Forward: A Proven Plan to Stop Drifting and Get the Life You Want by Michael Hyatt & Daniel Harkavy is an easy to read self-help book that is based on some of their traumatic experiences.
It is destined to increase our focus, to helps us find out what matters most, to acquire meaning and fulfillment in our everyday life, to allow us to prioritize our lives and to contribute effectively,
This book is written for people who are looking for a better direction for their life because they are either:
unsatisfied with the current state of their lives,
lack purpose,
seeking more balance,
unable to overcome life challenges,
noticing that their lives don’t fit their vision or dream,
not reaching their full potential.
The earlier we start creating and implementing a Life Plan, the better.
Favorite quote(s)
Living Forward will heighten your sense of what’s truly possible for you in life. If you feel out of balance, aware that your current pace is unsustainable; if you are making great gains professionally but don’t want to neglect personal priorities; if you want to have better focus to succeed financially; if you have gone through a recent tragedy and suddenly become aware that life is short; if any of those are true, this book is for you.
I know that how we lead ourselves in life impacts how we lead those around us. Self-leadership always precedes team leadership. We must have a balanced approach to accumulating net worth in all of the critical accounts in our lives, not just one or two. Ultimately this allows us to make the greatest difference and adds the most value to those around us. It is possible to grow at work without diminishing other areas of our lives. Living forward helps us find and maintain our balance.
We are often faced with stressful situations in our personal and professional lives…
Unfortunately, perception is reality.
That means that our perception of the situation will most of the time determines our reaction.
Shifting perception doesn’t mean switching viewpoint or distorting the truth but broadening your understanding of all facets of the situation.
Wondering how to shift your perspective?
Perception is a combination of the information collected, your experience and system of belief.
To shift it, there are some steps that you can take.
1. Put some distance between you and the drama
Sometimes, we get caught up in negative situations whether we want to or not or we stay in toxic environments longer than we should.
Removing yourself from that environment is the best way to change perspective.
If you are consistently surrounded by negative people, your thoughts will sooner or later become negative.
You may wonder whether you are creating or amplifying the negativity but if you remove yourself from it and it still goes on, you have nothing to do with it.
You probably just got caught up in someone else’s crazy.
2. Change your programming
You must be aware of the type of content that you allow to program your subconscious mind.
If you aren’t able to find the perspective you are looking for, seek out content that comforts you and that is similar to the perspective you wish to achieve or to the attitude you wish to emulate.
You may need to gather different sources of positivity around you like podcasts, books or movies.
3. Pay attention to self-talk
You are in control of your thoughts and of the way you react to situations.
In order to help your self-talk, you can use words of affirmation.
4. Adjust your expectations
Most drama in life comes from having too high expectations for people.
If someone has disappointed you or created unnecessary drama, you need to reset and lower your expectations for them.
5. Limit your time
If you are unable to physically remove yourself from drama, you can limit your time there while attempting to find a solution.
By doing so, you will gradually:
Prioritize the essentials.
Understand that everything is temporary.
Acknowledge that you don’t have to stay in it longer than necessary.
6. Find the lesson
Find the lesson and focus on the positives.
Finding the lesson in a negative situation allows you to look past yourself, to grow and to not be the victim.
7. Take a step back
Sometimes, we create our own drama or participate at some level in someone else’s.
According to Miguel Ruiz in The Four Agreements, taking someone else’s drama personally will only make things worse.
It then helps to take a step back to gather yourself and to evaluate the situation.
By doing so, you can also make sure that the story you tell yourself isn’t laced with elements of your past.
8. Change your reaction
You may no be able to shift your perspective just yet but you can change your reaction.
The truth is if you keep doing the same thing, you will keep getting the same result.
So, when faced with a situation that seems consistently challenging, try doing something different.
It may not solve the situation but you will get a different result and therefore gain more perspective.
9. See the bigger picture
Drama and the way we think about it can cause serious repercussions on your life.
Visualizing the bigger picture reframes the negative situation and reduces its impact.
Will this matter in the long run? In 5 days, 5 months or 5 years, will you remember this person or that job?
10. Forgive yourself
Staying in a negative situation, talking to negative people or walking around thinking about negative situation is damaging to your health and will only amplify the drama.
So, take the time to process the negative emotions, forgive yourself for staying in a bad situation for too long and hold on to the glimmer of hope.
Last Words Of Advice!
The circumstances of the situation you are dealing with depend on your perspective and your reaction.
Shifting perspective is a mind trick that allows you to better face challenges and that relies on the principal that you have the power to control your thoughts.
Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!
Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.
In Ego Is The Enemy, Ryan Holiday teaches you to stay humble in your aspirations, gracious in your success and resilient in your failures.
How to achieve your aspirations?
Ego is your worst enemy and can easily sink your ship. Ego blocks your progress in life and sometimes fast tracks your downfall. To improve and fight your ego, you must:
Be open to feedback but learn to evaluate your own abilities.
Practice detachment, tame your imagination before it runs wild and go through life with a quiet confidence.
Don’t stay stuck in your head. Instead, participate in what is going on around you.
Try staying silent in conversation. Silence can be strategic and is sustainable.
Always seek to learn. When you are a student, you absorb what is going on around you, you are focused on gaining knowledge and improving yourself.
Avoid being passionate. Instead, favor purpose and realism.
Ignore when people slight you and brush off the pain. Just think of it as you paying your dues.
 Avoid being prideful. Pride leads to arrogance. It impedes your ability “to learn, to adapt, to be flexible, to build relationships”.
Doing ever stop working.
How to maintain success?
You have aspirations and you have worked so hard to climb the ladder of success. However, when you start succeeding, you will start facing new ego problems that can quickly erode your success. To maintain long-term success:
Don’t pretend that you know what you are doing. Instead, keep learning, stay focused on facts and do your best.
Don’t compare yourself to others or try to keep up with the Joneses because you will end up doing things you don’t want to do.
Always remember your purpose and what is important to you before saying yes to opportunities.
Don’t be paranoid, entitled or controlling.
Learn to organize your thoughts, manage yourself and others.
Understand that selflessness and humility are strengths and not weaknesses.
Don’t try to be the center of attention, hug the spotlight and take credit for something you didn’t do or deserve.
Patiently progress towards you goals. It is better to go at it slow and steady.
How to handle failure?
Ego, power and success can make you delusional. You have to constantly self-monitor and stay attentive for your own downfalls. Moreover, everybody goes through setbacks in life. Failure is not fair and happens to good people too. But with a big ego, you tend to get caught by surprise. Your ego will make it hard for you to handle rock bottom. To be resilient in your failures:
Know your worth.
Stay humble and on purpose.
Don’t abandon your principles and maintain your character.
Don’t depend on recognition and reward.
Make use of your environment and transform your failures into something positive.
Understand that, even if you do everything right and perfect, you still will experience failure.
Discipline yourself to do the right thing. It will be hard but it will makes you less self absorbed on the long run.
Review
Ego Is The Enemy by Ryan Holiday is short, practical and direct self-development book. According to Ryan Holiday, there are three stages in life: aspirations, success, failure. You will have to discipline your ego in all three stages if you want to get somewhere. Ego is our own worst enemy. It becomes detrimental to suppress or manage our ego before we develop bad habits. For example, he warns us against common knowledge:
Don’t be passionate or you will fail. It is better to be apathetic and acknowledge the realities of your passions.
Don’t flatter your ego.
Don’t think you know everything.
Ego Is The Enemy is ideal for leaders who want to tame their ego, improve their leadership and relationships.
Let me know below what you think about this book!
Favorite quote(s)
Ego is stolen. Confidence is earned. Ego is self-anointed, its swagger is artifice. One is girding yourself, the other gaslighting. It’s the difference between potent and poisonous. Detachment is a sort of natural ego antidote. For your work to have truth in it, it must come from truth. We will learn that though we think big, we must act and live small in order to accomplish what we seek. The ability to deliberately keep yourself out of the conversation and subsist without its validation. Silence is the respite of the confident and the strong. All of us waste precious life doing things we don’t like, to prove ourselves to people we don’t respect, and to get things we don’t want.
Strong leaders constantly evaluate themselves, check their emotional status, practice self-discipline and maintain their cool no matter what…
Leaders cannot overcome hurdles, make tough decisions and eventually experience positive events if they are not emotionally strong.
Wondering how to become an emotionally strong leader?
1. Understand that your emotions are useful
Your emotions are there to guide you through life and not superimpose over your life because life is more than your emotions. Of course, you have relationships you care about, a purpose in life, passions and goals.
Good or bad, positive or negative, your emotions are useful and shouldn’t control your life.
Being able to gain control over your emotions is all about recognizing which emotion you are dealing with, acquiring self-awareness, engaging in positive self-talk and forging positive habits.
2. Acknowledge that everybody has problems
Everybody has problems and is a part of life. You just have to face them sooner or later.
The truth is there isn’t a person in this world who is problem free. There are just some people who are able to handle them and others who aren’t.
Emotionally strong leaders are solution-oriented and understand that problems actually build character, experience, grit and stamina.
3. Learn from your failures
There is always a lesson that can be learnt from your failures.
That is why there is no need to dwell on the past, but mental muscles are built through adversity and more lessons are learnt from failures than from success.
4. Realize that your mind can adapt to just about anything
Whatever you are going through, however uncomfortable you may feel, emotionally strong leaders don’t run away from their problems.
After a while, you will grow, get out of your comfort zone and your mind will simply adjust to your circumstances.
Adaptable leaders know how to self-regulate, focus on the important things they can control and don’t focus on the drama.
5. Find your purpose
Your purpose is made of clear life goals that will motivate you, help you wake up in the morning and help you overcome adversity.
When emotionally strong leaders have found their purpose and their inner motivator, they are able to focus on the essentials, easily influence and motivate others.
Last Words Of Advice!
Give yourself the freedom to express your thoughts and emotions when you really want to.
Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!
Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.
Journey To Leadership is now hosting networking events…
Leaders often have to make tough calls, take huge risks and face their deepest fears on a daily basis.
Fear has been infused into us since childhood, is often employed as an employee management tool, and guarantees a unique and universal experience at the same time.
Indeed, the same fear can manifest itself differently, can be based on different experiences and interpretations of events.
The truth is fear can be a friend or an enemy, can have a positive or negative impact, can be a motivator or an hindrance. It all depends on your understanding of your emotions, of fear itself and your level of self-control.
Wondering what are the best strategies to overcome your fears?
Most of the time, fear is standing right in front of our personal goals.
Hopefully, to every problem there is a solution.
Below are 4 proven strategies leaders use to overcome their fears.
1. Leaders identify their fears
Before overcoming your fears, you first have to identify them.
When you do identify them, it is time to write them down.
If you are unable to identify them, try journaling and describing on paper the situation that is bringing you fear to see if you can uncover a pattern or try asking the people closest to you.
Furthermore, journaling is a great way to acknowledge experiences, detach yourself from the fearful situation, log your thoughts during challenges, and to label your emotions.
2. Leaders get in touch with their inner self
Most people spend their entire life being completely disconnected with their inner self, without getting to know who they truly are and without achieving their life’s purpose.
That is how some many fears remain hidden and and it becomes necessary to get in touch with your inner self to overcome them.
Through exercise, meditation, visualization and deep breathing techniques, you can unclutter your mind and access your intuition.
3. Leaders upgrade their mindset
During difficult and fear inducing situations, it becomes detrimental to analyze your thoughts and feelings.
When you catch yourself thinking negatively, it helps to stop that thought, rewire your brain and replace that thought with a positive one.
After a while, you will come to understand yourself, fear and all its intricacies.
4. Leaders directly confront their fears
The best way to overcome your fears is to face them head on. Avoiding them might only increase your anxieties and your fears.
Once you face them, you will realize that there wasn’t really much to be afraid of.
Once you have identified your fears and the triggers associated to them, you will have more control over yourself, see the situation clearly and understand that these feelings often times don’t make sense.
Control your fears before they control you!
Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!
Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.
Journey To Leadership is now hosting networking events…
Are you Fully Charged? The 3 Keys To Energizing Your Work And Life by Tom Rath, introduces people to new strategies to increase their productivity and overall well-being at work and in their lives.
STRATEGY #1: Find meaning in helping people
Through his research, Tom Rath found that bringing meaning is detrimental to organizations and to self. Deriving meaningfulness from money and power is the fastest way to sabotage yourself, is not sustainable because it opens up door to comparison, damages your well-being and relationships.
In order to create meaningfulness, to strengthen your relationships and increase your performance at work:
Stop seeking happiness and stop putting your well-being first all the time. Sometimes, put people’s need before your own.
Create meaningful interactions to protect yourself from negative thoughts, depressions.
Contribute to a collective good to make a difference.
Dedicate extra hours to meaningful activities.
Avoid doing what people expect of you but explore different areas of interests.
Focus on the impact of your work, on internal motives rather than external motives. Find ways to remind yourself of your internal motivators daily.
Understand your contribution to your organization, your efforts to work. Your efforts can be attached to a larger purpose afterwards.
Identify the right work to that it is not only a monetary transaction and that you are emotionally engaged, have better interactions with your colleagues, be more productive. Financial security contribute to happiness.
Assess your strengths and weaknesses and apply them to the organization, fill a specific need. Work on your talents to grow and be great at something
Say no to distractions. Being busy is not synonymous to importance or progress.
STRATEGY #2: Create positive interactions
To thrive in the workplace and to better your work performance, it is important to intentionally create positive interactions:
Assume the best of a situation and of an interaction and learn to convert a negative into a positive.
In performance review, spend more time discussing strengths than weaknesses.
Use positive words to build on relationships. Creating strong bonds with coworkers fosters creativity and increase effectiveness at work, takes a year to solidify. When confronting or in a difficult situation, preface with positive words.
Take small steps and appreciate small wins. For example, make someone smile before making them laugh.
Pay attention to people so that they don’t assume the worst about you.
Ask questions to initiate a conversation, to engage a debate, to build influence, to negotiate.
Share embarrassing moments and mistakes to instill trust and to remain humble.
Mirror someone else’s behavior to better the conversation.
Don’t use your phone when spending time with people, show that you value the conversation, their time and openness.
Create enjoyable experiences with loved ones to create long-lasting positive memories. We tend to forget the purchase of material goods over time even though we felt good while buying it. Create experiences instead and treasure the memory.
Spend money on people you care about. Seeing them happy will instantly make you happy.
Plan experiences ahead and share the details with people around you so you can look forward to something and increase your well-being.
To motivate people to work for you, have them do something for someone else or for the benefit of the team.
Be sincere, help someone see their potential and develop their self-confidence.
STRATEGY #3: Take care of yourself
Leaders are the first to arrive early at work and leave late, to sleep less hours. they claim they are busy but their lifestyle is unsustainable and will lead to burnout.
Watch what you eat. Acquiring the right food has nothing to do with calories count but everything with quality. Therefore, eat healthy, avoid fried foods, carbohydrates, sugar and eat more vegetables to boost your energy and to positively influence your mood.
The human body isn’t built for a sedentary lifestyle. Exercise, avoid sitting down and add as much exercise and movements a day as possible, especially in the morning.
Sleep 20 minutes through the day and sleep longer at night to increase your ability to think, your productivity, health and well-being. Lack of sleep reduces alertness and awareness.
Don’t work on a same activity for too long, it will diminish your performance. Take multiple breaks.
To improve sleep quality, close the light of your electronic devices, cancel out noises with white noise or noise cancelling devices.
Good lifestyle habits create a buffer against stressful situations and slow down the aging process.
Take a minute before responding to a negative situation.
View stressful situations as challenges.
Review
Are you Fully Charged? The 3 Keys To Energizing Your Work And Life, by Tom Rath, is an easy to read self-help book, a practical guide to life and social interactions. It teaches us how to increase our well-being and make the mots of a bad experience.
Tom Rath has been battling an illness his whole life and as a consequence has the ability to put a positive spin on any situation.
Favorite quote(s)
I have discovered that creating meaning is central not just to my existence but to that of every organization in society today. Businesses, schools, governments, families, and faith-based groups are being challenged more than ever to show how they make a meaningful contribution to society. The essential thing people want in a job today is work that will allow them to create meaning for others.
Work should be more than a necessary means to an end.
The best experiences create memories and well-being that last for years to come.
Self talk is everything. Matter of fact, it has been proven that negative self talk has tremendous impact on your health and your level of success.
Indeed, we can determine our emotions and actions by steering our thoughts. We can then control out thoughts by monitoring our self talk and the language we use. We can finally use strong and assertive language when speaking to and about ourselves.
There are several principles to change your mindset, to unf*** yourself and to achieve true success.
1. Your life won’t change until you make it
You must understand that you:
Have the life that you are willing to put up with.
Are not defined by your circumstances but only how you respond to them.
Even if you have no control over life events, you have full control of how you respond to it.
So, it is imperative that you stop playing the victim, stop blaming others, stop blaming luck, your childhood and other external influences for your circumstances.
You must also find out what you are willing or unwilling to pursue and put up with.
2. You will succeed at whatever you set your mind to
The reality is that you are already winning at the life you have.
Your failures and hurts are hidden victories that are pushing towards your subconscious goals in whatever domain you are working in.
You will find out sooner or later that you are really good at what you believe, at realizing your assumptions about yourself.
Therefore, once you understand that principle, you can use that aspect of our mind to go after positive goals.
3. It’s all a matter of perspective
Negative experiences have a tendency to spread like wildfire. It seeps through our everyday life and turn small problems into bigger ones.
The reality is everybody has problems butyour problem is not always as big as it seems. To put things into perspective:
Don’t allow your struggles to overlap with different aspects of your life.
Take several steps back until you have a clear logical view of your problems.
Face your past and future. You have probably faced these same problems in the past or worse and have overcome them. Looking back at your past, you will realize how ridiculous some problems now seem.
Believe that the future has great things in store for you.Â
Solve problems one by one.
4. You must take risks to be successful
We are obsessed with a need for safety and for certainty. Subsequently, we have stopped taking risks.
At some point in your life, you were taking risks.
Those risks have now become an inherent part of your routine. The moment you stop taking risks is the moment your life becomes flat and unsuccessful.
To be successful, you have to be willing to take risks, to face uncertainty, to look stupid and to be judged.
5. You are not your feelings
What you think and what you do are two different things and won’t necessarily align.
Most successful people and overachievers have understood that principle.
They feel the negative feelings but focus and act independently from their thoughts.
You don’t have to feel like it to act like it. By acting or by fully immersing yourself in activities, you reduce the amount of negative thoughts that you experience.
6. Success is waiting outside of your comfort zone
Some of your biggest achievements happened when you stepped out your comfort zone.
The more you remove yourself from your comfort zone, the more you will feel a sense of accomplishments when you succeed.
7. You have to be relentless
To get what you want, you have to be relentless, avoid distractions and disagree with negative thoughts.
You also have to start focusing on the problems in front of you, one obstacle at a time.
You don’t give up, you don’t quit, you don’t change your plans.
8. Your expectations won’t always be met
Remember that you have the freedom to choose.
Life and opportunities will never fully meet your expectations.
That’s why you have to learn to expect nothing and accept everything.
Review
Unf*** Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and into Your Life by Gary John Bishop, is designed for people who feel stuck in life, who lack introspection and who need to build themselves up from the inside out.
Unf*** Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and into Your Life teaches you how to talk to yourself, to find your true potential, to stop self sabotage and being offended.
Gary John Bishop repurposed the ancient principles of stoicism and shares tips on how to master your mind in order to be successful.
He also provides you with great words of affirmation and personal assertions. So, check it out!
Let me know below what you think about this book!
Favorite quote(s)
The more you tell yourself how hard something is, the harder it will actually seem.
It’s entirely within our power to determine how we think about and talk about our problems. They can be a nuisance or a stepping stone. They can hold us down or lift us up.
everything is solve-able, and if you can’t see a solution, it only means you haven’t worked it out yet.
Success is never certain. It never comes without risk.
We make decisions all day that will affect the rest of our lives.
These decisions have to be thought through in order for us to have the life we want.
They affect our self-esteem, relationships, career, lifestyle, … our everyday.
The truth is, there is always an element of risk in everything that we do.
Wondering what are the risks that every leader should take?
1. Bet on yourself
The best bet you can take is on yourself.
Indeed, you are your best tool for success even if you cannot predict the future or the outcome of your decision.
If you want to achieve great things, you must first believe in yourself then make sure that you are always performing at your best.
2. Get to know yourself better
Getting to know yourself better means trying new activities, seeing what you like and dislike, what you are good at or not.
Being authentically yourself requires courage and the belief that nobody needs to like you.
3. Improve on yourself
Change is scary for most people.
When you try to improve on yourself, the people around you will resist that change, may even think that you are crazy and may not recognize you.
They will pressure you to revert to your old self. You will risk losing friends and family in order for you to grow and to feel good about yourself.
4. Reinvent yourself
Don’t do what is expected of you.
Your life will be dull if you did what everyone else wanted of you.
Your friends and family certainly have your best interest at heart but most of the time they can stunt your growth and bring down your expectations so you don’t outgrow them, so you don’t change.
To break these expectations, start doing things that your entourage will laugh or look down upon.
5. Put yourself out there
Everyone observes and judges others at some point in their life. Honestly, we all do it whether we mean to do it or not.
Everybody criticizes. Criticism can be negative or positive but it can sometimes be useful.
It only hurts if you let it or if you agree with the criticism.
So, put yourself out there:
Risk of being judged or appearing foolish.
Don’t be afraid to look stupid doing something.
6. Pursue your dreams
Don’t live in regrets and what ifs.
You don’t want to get old and realize that you didn’t do what you set out to do.
Furthermore, the happiest or most content people are driven, purposeful and allow themselves to dream and act upon their dream.
There comes a point in time when you have to chose between your goals and your friends. You have to know that it is OK to miss out on fun events with friends and family in order to work on your goals and advance your purpose.
7. Admit your mistakes
When you take risks, you will always make mistakes.
Mistakes are signs that you are human, trying new things and getting our of your comfort zone.
Sometimes, we think that there is no going back from our mistakes, we cannot move on and we cannot be forgiven for what we have done.
You will ever know if you don’t take the risks and ask for forgiveness.
8. Learn to forgive
When other people on your team make mistakes, you must learn to give them a second chance.Â
The risk or the certainty is that they will mess up again but they will have enough confidence to fix their mistakes.
Consequently, they will trust you more, be more creative and forgive you more when you make a mistake. Â
9. Show emotion
In the workplace, showing emotion is risky because people will tend to use them against you.
In order to not be taken advantage of, you really have to own them and discipline yourself.Â
10. Ask questions
Leaders must acknowledge that they don’t know everything.Â
It’s better to ask questions and look dumb for a few minutes than say nothing and be dumb for a lifetime.
11. Speak up
Leaders must speak truth to power, speak with truth, power, integrity and transparency.
They must stand up for what they believe in and speak up when it’s right even when it’s hard to do.
In addition, they express their opinion, don’t try to manage other people’s feelings and opinions: they say what they mean and mean what their say.
People who are able to speak up confidently, say what bothers them and what doesn’t are the people who usually go far in life.
12. Analyze opportunities
Before taking any risks, you must always analyze the pros and the cons of your decisions.
You have the right to say no to opportunities that don’t fit you.
You have the duty to say yes more often to things that scare you.
Just remember that you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
13. Risk rejection
If you haven’t been rejected in life, then you haven’t done anything worthwhile.
You have to dare to apply to jobs you don’t have the qualifications for, talk to people outside your circle with different affinities.
If people don’t return your interests, then they are the ones missing out.Â
14. Let go of things you cannot control
You must take the risk that everything will work out on its own and you don’t have to control everything.
15. Don’t be afraid of getting hurt
Taking risks implies that you will be vulnerable most of the time.
In other words, it means that you open yourself up to get hurt.
Because pain is inevitable, you can go for it and perform at the best of your abilities.Â
16. Overcome your fears one by one
You will not feel confident going towards your fears. However, once you have faced your fears, you will feel good about yourself and be ready to take on any life challenges.
In reality, your fears are not as bad as you think and facing them help you build confidence.Â
Most of the time, your mind and your ego are exaggerating your fears to protect you.
17. Travel
Travelling allows you to reframe your mindset, to learn new things and meet new people.
It also allows you to try out different versions of yourself.
It costs money but it is totally worth it.
Last Words Of Advice!
Life is an adventure! Don’t live in regrets and live your life to the fullest.
Taking risks is the best chance you have to get to know yourself, predict the future and achieve your highest potential.
The bigger the risk, the bigger the reward.
Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!
Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.
Leaders are generally very busy and have a tendency to spread themselves pretty thin.
They dabble in multiple activities but don’t take the time to relax and to smell the flowers.
While achieving their goals, it seems that they forget to live life to the fullest and can hardly make the difference between Monday, Friday or Saturday.
Wondering how leaders live their life to the fullest?
Living life to the fullest means that you go after what you want without letting fear get in the way.
1. Leaders focus on themselves
Leaders work towards their goals everyday, focus on themselves and not on others.
Leaders who live their life to the fullest focus their time and energy on things that matter.
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