8 Ways Great Leaders Deal With Disappointment

Recently, I have made solid plans around an opportunity that didn’t turn out. Thou I didn’t care much about the opportunity, I was frustrated that the plans that I carefully hatched fell through.

In order to find out why the opportunity fell off, I had a conversation with a toxic individual who spewed lies and venom and with whom I happened to get out of character.

Because I lost my plans for the future and gave away my personal power, I was deeply disappointed in myself and in the circumstances.

If you are a trailblazing leader, are goal-oriented or enjoy making plans for the future, these moments happen often and you will face a lot of disappointments in your life.

That is why, you simply have to learn to cope with it.

Wondering how leaders overcome disappointment in life?

8 Ways Great Leaders Deal With Disappointment #resilience #adversity #leadership #failure #success #selfesteem

The importance of disappointments

Disappointment is defined as feelings of sadness or displeasure caused by feelings of unfulfilled hope and failed expectations.

Sometimes, an opportunity that we wished for just doesn’t turn out; A person we are hoping for doesn’t show up or act right.

However, life never goes according to plans. Eventually, you will make new plans, you will realize that not every opportunity is a good opportunity and not everyone is good for you.

Feelings of disappointment are hard to get rid off at first but are ephemeral. Those feelings will go away with time.

Once you have overcome these feelings, you will finally understand who you truly are, you can grow as a person, become a stronger person, and build up your character.

How to overcome disappointment?

1. Accept your emotions

Disappointment is part of life and everyone will experience it at some point in life.

Disappointment can trigger a vast array of emotions that you cannot run away from or cover up.

It becomes critical to acknowledge your feelings and find out what exactly triggered it.

Refusing to analyze, confront and discipline your emotions can cause long-term damage on your health.

2. Forgive yourself

Learning to forgive yourself is the hardest part of dealing with disappointment because we are grasping our errors and what we “should” have done instead.

You are only human. You have made mistakes and you will probably make some more.

So, be compassionate with yourself, avoid shifting blame and take care of yourself. Eat well, sleep well and exercise.

3. Reframe your mindset

Now, that you have dealt with your raw emotions, it is time to restructure your mindset, improve on yourself, analyze your situation and mentally distance yourself from your past expectations.

This is the moment when you get comfortable with feeling uncomfortable, when you accept disappointment as a part of life and as a challenge, when you use it to improve yourself and to change the way you have been doing things.

While you are reframing your mindset:

  • Monitor your self-talk.
  • Don’t expect to be constantly disappointed because you attract what you think.
  • Practice self control to make better decisions, to nurture healthy thoughts because you are responsible for yourself.

4. Shift your focus

Now that you have reframed your mind, you have to trust that positivity can result from a negative situation and focus on turning your negative situation into a positive one.

The best way to keep moving forward and to making the best out of any situation is to  stay busy, positive, focused and on purpose, to focus on your strengths and on who you want to be.

You can also find out what you could have done differently and make your goals more achievable.

5. Stay present

Your disappointment happened in the past and it’s time to move on.

There is no sense in replaying a situation in your mind over and over again.

It becomes detrimental to your health to be present and be grateful for what you currently have.

If you cannot remain in the present and keep ruminating, it is best to quickly analyze your feelings until you get closure.

6. Surround yourself with positive people

Disappointment can turn into a burden that can be too heavy for one person.

It can be helpful to share your disappointment with people you trust and who care about you.

As a general notice:

  • Be careful who you surround yourself with.
  • Stay away from people who constantly disappoint you or who hurt you on purpose.

7. Let go control

In life, you must always remember that you cannot control everything that happens to you or around you.

Therefore, 

  • Don’t worry about the circumstances outside your control. It won’t change anything.
  • Trust that life has a better plan and solution for you.
  • Remember that there are many more opportunities out there.
  • Don’t get too attached to your plans and expectations.
  • Expect setbacks in life.

8. Grow!

Remember that life is a journey and that every failure brings you closer to your success.

We can learn something from every life experience, even from our disappointments.

Last Words Of Advice!

No matter the situation, always maintain your personal power.

There is no need to always throw yourself a pity party.

Once you have given yourself time to heal and when you get over your feelings of disappointment, you must think about what you could have done differently and implement the new solution the next time you face a similar situation.

Now that you know better, do better!

 

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

 

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10 Reasons Empathy Matters In Leadership

Most people believe that the best leaders have the highest IQ, are emotionless and analytical.

Indeed, empathy is seen as a weakness in the workplace. The less you have, the more you will succeed.

The truth is the best leaders are empathetic, compassionate, highly sensitive and have high level of emotional intelligence.

Wondering why empathetic people make the best leaders?

10 Reasons Empathy Matters In Leadership

Empathy is a strong leadership skill that helps leaders to connect with people.

Empathy builds compassionate leaders which consequently improves the health of workplaces.

Empathetic leaders understand what others need, are feeling emotionally and physically.

They rather listen than speak, they don’t need to communicate verbally because they pick up on verbal and non verbal cues.

#1. Empathetic leaders pick up on the emotions of others

Empathetic leaders are self-aware.

They understand themselves, pay attention to people’s non verbal cues and are able to perceive the emotions of others. As a result, they are able to easily relate to people.

#2. Empathetic leaders are a great judge of character

Empathetic leaders are true to themselves and notice inauthentic people.

They can easily distinguish a lie from the truth, which makes them highly ethical.

#3. Empathetic leaders are people persons

They put people first and use servant leadership style.

For the main part, they direct their attention on people and not on results.

They understand people and the motivations behind their behaviors. This also gives them an ability to build good relationships and avoid bad ones.

#4. Empathetic leaders are present

Empathetic leaders live in the present.

When someone is talking to them, they give them their full attention in order to sense their feelings and to access their emotions.

#5. Empathetic leaders are peace makers

Empathetic leaders enjoy their peace of mind. They want to get rid of conflicts or negative situation at all costs.

They cannot stand chaos or conflicts. So whenever a negative situation arises or whenever they sense negative emotions, they take it upon yourself to restore peace.

#6. Empathetic leaders create a healthy workplace

Being an empathetic leader is critical to the workplace.

Empathetic leaders have a tendency to calm people down and to build trust.

They set up their environment so that everyone can succeed.

Their behavior induces greater collaboration, increase performance and creates a healthier workplace.

#7. You are ethical

They have strong core values.

They follow ethics and work for the greater good.

#8. Empathetic leaders give good advice

Because empathetic leaders understand the origin of problems so well, because they know how to listen, people come to them for advice.

They usually are wise, solution-oriented, and possess the answer to most problems.

#9. Empathetic leaders lead with their intuition

Empathetic leaders lead with intuition to make important decisions. You sense where to go and what to do.

They have strong gut feelings and their gut is always right.

#10. Empathetic leaders know how to influence and how to motivate

They are attuned to what your team secretly needs and wants to succeed.

They know how to persuade and motivate people.

As much as they can step in other people’s shoes, they can change your point of view and influence you towards the same goals.

Last Words Of Advice!

Some empathetic leaders have roles that require their full attention and that challenge their empathy.

For that reason, most empathetic leaders evolve towards liberal and helping professions.

It is important for them to learn how to navigate people and negative situations.

  1. Spend time a few hours a day alone.
  2. Discipline your emotions.
  3. Observe the company culture and see how you can employ your empathetic leadership style.

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

Getting Promoted At Work — 32 Easy Strategies To Take Control Of Your Career

Getting a promotion is a long and complex process that can trigger your innermost insecurities. Therefore, it requires a lot of internal and external work. 

Furthermore, getting promoted involves being willing to take risks, changing your bad habits, increasing self-awareness, improving your behavior, being able to compete for a position, being committed to a goal and to an organization.

Wondering how to take control of your career, get a pay raise, get promoted, or move on to a new successful career?

Getting Promoted At Work

To be promoted, you have to make yourself valuable and bring success to your organization. Promotion comes from a need to:

  • Be recognized.
  • Take on new responsibilities.
  • Gain more influence, more authority, more respect and more credibility.
  • Get a pay raise.
  • Learn new skills.
  • Have greater impact on your organization.
  • Acquire a higher sense of achievement, of job satisfaction.

You must pursue a promotion for the right reasons.

Indeed, if you decide to go after a proportion for the money, for a feeling of superiority, for an ego boost, for revenge purposes, you will not last long in the position.

  • Be mindful of the impact of your promotion. Measure the changes that the promotion will brig and if you will be able to handle them, if your time and health will be jeopardized, if your priorities will be rearranged, your relationships repurposed, your commitments denied, if there will be more power plays and more politics. Establishing the pros and cons of the promotions will clarify the reasons why you are pursuing a promotion.
  • Identify your ideal position, ideal boss, career path and compare it to the promotion.
  • Do your homework on the promotion, identify the required standards of your promotion then demonstrate that you meet the requirements for the new position.

How to get promoted?

To get promoted, you must get noticed for the right reasons. It is necessary to build your brand from day one. As soon as you leave your house, you have to be mindful of your behavior, your appearance, your words and your brand.

To maximize your potential, to build your brand and to finally get that promotion:

  1. Stay prepared for success. Stay focused and competent at your job, meet your goals and deadlines, remember that experience will build up your credibility.
  2. Present yourself in the best light possible. Mind your image and your grooming. Your style says a lot about you and is your first representative.
  3. Decide what yo want to be known for and guard your reputation with your life. Remain professional at all times when at work, stay away from drama, don’t gossip and mind what you say to others.
  4. Understand that you must establish your identity and your self-worth outside of your career and your job description.
  5. Lead by example and establish a code of conduct for yourself.
  6. Learn to be patient and to slowly reap what you sow.
  7. Find out what matters most to you, keep commitments to yourself and to others, create a vision board, repeat positive affirmations if you have to, set goals and review them daily.
  8. Temper your desire to speak out, to speak first and to speak the loudest. Keep your message brief all the time. Avoid talking just to fill the silence and avoid small talk if you are incapable of handling it.
  9. Speak clearly, control your voice tone, pitch, pace, diction and intonations. Also, be careful of the words that are coming out of your mouth. Stay positive in your delivery and never use the word “no”.
  10. Listen not with the intent to reply but the desire to understand, with the desire to read between the lines, to take real interest in what people are saying and to be empathetic.
  11. Pay attention to the unspoken language, gestures. Remember that talk is cheap, that actions speak louder than words. On your side, make sure that you keep eye contact during conversation.
  12. Learn to rely on your gut, on your instincts, on your common sense.
  13. Boost your leadership self-esteem from time to time.
  14. Be confident in your abilities, know your strengths and weaknesses, be open to learnConfidence will help you develop your presence and command respect. Besides, don’t allow your strengths that have gotten you noticed so far be the reasons of your demise, of your career derailment.
  15. Stay authentic to be able to build relationships.
  16. Keep your integrity throughout the process. Don’t do things that you don’t want to do or you don’t think are right to do.
  17. Be a problem solver, taking into account the company culture and requirements. To every problem you bring to the forefront, find a solution to it. Anticipate issues, gain perspective, be responsive, adapt to different circumstances and learn to solve them before they show up. This will make you more reliable, more empathetic, will leave you two steps ahead. This will also get higher-ups to trust and respect you.
  18. Be flexible and organized.
  19. Show initiative and keep your motivation.
  20. Show that you can effectively manage conflicts and face challenge. Furthermore, learn to control your emotions to control your behavior, keep your composure in difficult times, stay optimistic and see pressure points as opportunities.
  21. Improve your communication style and learn to adapt  your style to different context.
  22. Keep the communication line open with your boss, inform him or her of your latest achievements and seek feedback. During performance reviews, mention your career goals, directly ask for a promotion or for more responsibilities for example.
  23. Take risks and don’t be afraid of failure. If you fail, turn a negative into a positive, learn from your mistakes, avoid dwelling on your past, avoid beating yourself up or blowing events out of proportion.
  24. Be accountable, correct past mistakes and avoid shifting blame.
  25. Understand the company culture, learn to deal with office politics. 
  26. Be loyal to your employer, have the best interest of your organization at heart and demonstrate your intentions.
  27. Take every opportunity to network and to build a list of contacts who can help you. To do so, master your people skills, discover how to sell yourself, treat every encounter like gold, do more favors than you ask for. Talk about your own achievements, your interests and motivations without overbearing your audience. However, don’t toot your own horn, don’t be desperate to make contact, don’t nag people, don’t focus too much on yourself  or else you will damage your relationships.
  28. Enter a mentorship program or find a mentor in your organization who can give you some advice and take your career to the next level.
  29. Volunteer for additional and interesting work outside of your position, for a position that you wish you had inside your organization.
  30. Attend training programs and seminars.
  31. Don’t try to please everyone. Respectability trumps likeability every single time.
  32. If you don’t get promoted, move on or create your own opportunities. But no matter what you do, don’t feel entitled to the promotion.

 

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.