18 Innovative Approaches To Improve Your Positive Thoughts, To Change Your Work Life And Your Leadership

Thoughts, positive or negative, influence our character, our behavior, our vision, how we deal with setbacks, how we build and maintain relationships, has direct impact on our body and health, emotions…

For instance, negative thoughts affect our daily lives more than we think and can send us down a spiral of despair, depression, insecurity, anxiety and self-sabotage.

Needless to say, most people want to improve themselves, to evolve, to get ahead in their work life but have a tendency to welcome negative thoughts or ignore how to shut them down.

Unfortunately, they end up hindering their accomplishments and career advancements.

That is why it is necessary to control the damage caused by our mind, to discipline our thoughts and emotions, to build up a robust positive attitude and to find peace of mind.

Wondering how to process and control negative thoughts, emotions and how to use a positive mindset to get ahead at work?

18 Innovative Approaches To Improve Your Positive Thoughts, To Change Your Work Life And Your Leadership

Thoughts automatically appear in our mind. They come from past experiences and from the fact that we believe what people have previously said about us. They can be brought up by a word, an image or a memory and employ torture words that decrease our self-esteem, worsens situations, such as “should”, “must” and “have to”.

Because they are spontaneous, we think that they are true. In the long run, thoughts sometimes become rigid beliefs, absolute truths.

Therefore, it becomes an imperative to gain control over them. Disciplining your mind, controlling your thoughts and generating emotions regardless of your environment, regardless the level of attack help you become more mature, make healthier decisions, become more creative, escape, heal bad memories.

Maintaining A Positive Mindset

Positive attitudes can become difficult to maintain in challenging situations in the workplace. But once acquired, it is a habit that can help you overcome bad situations.

Indeed, positivity ensures progress, diffuses situations, alleviates stress, reduces fear, increases endurance, increase self-esteem, attracts positive results and better opportunities. It requires inner work and is independent of external circumstances of the outcome.

There are many ways to bring positivity into the workplace and to your mindset.

1. Identify the source of your thoughts 

Identify the source of your thoughts and check the memories that you store in your brain.

Be selective about the information that come into your mind.

Stay away from the news because they will negatively affect you.

Have a joke of the day and send it to people who matter to you. Watch shows, listen to podcasts, audio books that will uplift you, inspire you and motivate you.

2. Identify triggers, patterns in your thought process

Identify triggers, patterns in your thought process.

How do they start? What my thoughts say about me? What are the consequences of my thoughts? What do you say regularly to yourself?

3. Be aware of the content of your thoughts

At some point, you must be aware of the content of your thoughts.

Therefore, you will be able to interrupt them whenever they don’t help you, to delete the negative ones and replace them with forward-looking ones. Changing thought patterns is difficult because our brain generally resist change.

4. Understand that you are not the prisoner of your thoughts

When you understand that you are not the prisoner of your thoughts, you will eventually become the one to change the atmosphere in the workplace, won’t allow the environment to drain you or define who you are and won’t let someone else control your behavior.

5. Think about who you want to become

It helps to:

  • Think about who you want to become and how you want to affect people.
  • Write down 5 dreams that you have ever have, find 5 words to describe yourself and think about it several a day.

6. Select and force your brain to redirect negative thoughts

When faced with negativity, select and force your brain to redirect negative thoughts toward more pleasant alternatives.

For example, think about the opposite of the negative thought, attach constructive emotions to an outcome, visualize a positive outcome for the situation or visualize the perfect life every day before you got to bed and everyday when you wake up.

7. Focus on what is going right

What’s going right for you?

Focus on what is going right instead of what is going wrong.

People give negative emotions more importance than the positive ones, which conditions our brain to bring up negative thoughts automatically and repetitively for a long period of time.

You have the power to choose and train your brain to give positive emotions more attention.

8. Accept the present moment

Improving your thoughts reside in accepting the present moment and understanding that it is inevitable.

How to focus and stay in the present? Understand that panicking and worrying is useless, that the past is unchangeable and the future uncontrollable, that every experiences have made you who you are today.

9. Give your thoughts a name

Give your thoughts a name and call them out whenever they send us down a negative spiral and challenge every single thought by speaking them out loud.

10. Be grateful

It is easy to complain and whine, so be grateful that you have a job and show appreciation in your contribution.

11. Learn to discern toxic coworkers

Learn to discern toxic coworkers.

Don’t tolerate or focus on negative people.

12. Wake up early

Get up early and work out before going to work to seize the day and release the endorphins throughout the day.

13. Create a positive work zone

Create a positive work zone by insulating yourself with headphones for example.

Also, avoid gossip at all cost, put up motivational objects around your desk.

Take regular breaks from your cubicle to stop thinking, to meditate and go to the bathroom.

14. Create a better work life balance

It becomes essential to create a better work life balance to protect your home life.

So, leave the drama at work, be strict with your hours, avoid staying late and taking work at home!

15. Behave positively as well

Meaning fake it until you make it…

16. Separate yourself from the negativity

Sooner or later, you will have to separate yourself from the negativity and surround yourself with open-minded people with a positive mindset.

One way would be to stick positive quotes on your wall of your cubicle or on your desk.

17. Change your surroundings

Take a class after work or find a hobby so you have something to look forward to at the end of the day.

18. Find better!

Finally, if this environment isn’t working out the way you want to, you can always discreetly find a more comfortable and productive workplace.

Last Words Of Advice!

There is a need for Positive Leadership.

Positive leaders have a moral compass, are purpose driven, communicate effectively, exhibit integrity and provide emotional safety.

Because they inject good energy into the team, they instill an atmosphere of trust and openness they rip enthusiasm, motivation, transparency from their team.

Positive leaders are able to impact their company culture, improve results, increase performance and enhance job satisfaction.

18 Innovative Approaches To Improve Your Positive Thoughts, To Change Your Work Life And Your Leadership

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

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The power of No: 36 Different Ways To Say No In The Workplace

Whether or not you’re asked to take on new tasks, to work on different projects or you have been given a new opportunity, saying no without guilt or justification is a leadership skill that will often come into play.

Learning how and why to say no is a vital leadership skill that few people master.

Indeed, it is difficult for some poeple to say no because the word “no” has often a negative connotation and is assimilated to rejection.

In addition, even though the word “no” is powerful, it is often followed by a sense of guilt.

Wondering what are the different ways to say no?

The power of No: 36 Different Ways To Say No In The Workplace #journeytoleadership journeytoleadershipblog.com

The Benefits Of Saying No

No means no and saying no is a right.
In addition, No is a sentence in itself. This means that you don’t have to explain yourself.
When you say no to one thing, you:

  • Automatically say yes to something else.
  • Commit yourself to something else.
  • Become honest with yourself and satisfy your basic needs.
  • Say no to things that are not essential or that don’t add value to your life.
  • Focus on what you want.
  • Are responsible for your actions.
  • Choose the life you really want.
  • Handle your time efficiently.
  • Acquire a healthy work life balance.
  • Improve your metal healthy.
  • Increase your self-confidence.

The Different Ways Of Saying No

  1. No

    As simply as it is, no is a powerful word in itself and needs no justification. If you don’t want to do something, that’s OK. Don’t apologize for it.

  2. No, thank you

  3. I have a prior commitment

  4. Maybe another time…

  5. I’m honoured but I can’t

  6. Unfortunately, this is not a good time

  7. I am unable to commit to that right now

  8. I cannot fit that into my schedule

  9. I’ll pass on that

  10. I’m not really into that but thank you

  11. I know, I’m sorry

    This line works for people who you know, who you care about and who care about you. Otherwise, the person making the request will take this as a sign of request.

  12. Thank you but no thank you

    This says that you are somehow flattered by the proposition but cannot commit to it. It has the luxury of not being followed by an excuse.

  13. It’s not doable

  14. It’s not possible

  15. It’s not a good time right now

  16. I’m flattered but I can’t

  17. Thank you for thinking of me but I can’t

    Use I don’t instead of I can’t Introduce them to someone or something who can do what they are asking for

  18. I made other plans

  19. This isn’t going to work for me

  20. This is not in my schedule

  21. This is not a priority

  22. Now is not a good time

  23. Maybe next time

  24. This is too last minute

  25. Let me check my calendar and I’ll get back to you

  26. Silence

    Silence is a powerful toolgo convey a message. Whether you want to say yes or no, pause and measure your words.

  27. Did you know…?

    Changing the conversation is a good way to day no without saying no and to talk about something you care about.

  28. I would rather…

  29. I need to take care of something else

  30. I have other priorities

  31. That would be great but I have other plans

  32. I appreciate that but…

  33. It goes against my principles

  34. It goes against my intuition

    Trust your intuition because your gut always knows best. You just have to take the time to listen to it.

  35. This makes me uncomfortable

  36. Let me think about it

    Phrases such as these will allow you to buy up some time so you can think of a more appropriate answer.

Last Words Of Advice!

Sometimes, you will meet people who will not respect your no or your setting of boundaries. You don’t have to recant yourself, you simply have the repeat yourself.

If they still don’t respect that, you have every right to walk away.

If you have a hard time saying no, think about the consequences of saying yes. This will motivate you to do the right thing.

Don’t forget that you can also come up with your own ways of saying no.

 

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7 Hiring Errors To Avoid At All Cost

Hiring the right people to progress your organization is a long and tough process.


It is detrimental to determine what you are looking for beforehand and then to take your time to find the adequate person.

Wondering what are the main errors recruiters make?

7 Hiring Errors To Avoid At All Cost #mistakes #hiring #recruiting #recruitment #journeytoleadership journeytoleadershipblog.com

1. Hiring on ego

During the recruitment process, some candidates lay it on real thick in order to get the job.

However, it is easy to let ego lead the way and to overlook the red flags.

2. Hiring on charisma

Some candidates dominate the interview, speak a lot, don’t answer the question and don’t actively listen.

However, they are eloquent speakers, with charisma, who can easily command respect.

It is your responsibility to find the most authentic candidates, to ask poignant questions, to stay on topic and get to the point.

3. Hiring identical profiles

Some recruiters are often tempted to hire people with the same educational and professional background as them.

That is because these recruiters believe that hiring on identical profile is an instant ice breaker, is able to create commonalities, and will them and the candidates on the same wavelength.

However, this hiring strategy make for boring meetings and can damage the overall creativity of the organization.

4. Hiring by diploma

Some companies tend to hire candidates with the same resumes who graduated from the same school or from high profile universities.

By doing so, you can easily dismiss the right if not the perfect candidate who has an out of the box resume but who will fit the company culture, have respectable experiences and be able to take on new responsibilities.

5. Hiring on friendship

Hiring a friend seems like a great idea at first but hiring a friend requires a lot of self discipline and setting clear boundaries.

Indeed, most of the time, the lines between personal and professional lived are blurred.

Recruiters then find themselves playing favorites or unable to manage their friend as a regular employee.

6. Hiring on fear

Unfortunately, some recruiters believe that hiring a competent person or someone with ambitions will put them at risk of losing their jobs, demonstrate that they are replaceable, or make them look bad and incompetent.

The reality is that hiring  the right and competent person for the job will only make them look better, show that they make good decisions, and reveal that they value collaboration over competition.

7. Hiring on borrowed time

Recruiters may want to fill an open position as soon as possible.

However, they just cannot hire the first person who shows up at their desk.

They have to take the time to find out who that person is and to understand their resume. Does he fit the company culture? Does she have the proper qualifications? Is he up for the challenge or can he step up to his responsibilities?

Last Words Of Advice!

Hiring from different backgrounds, ages and genders is a great way to attract the most talents and makes for a successful recruitment process.

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Designing An Innovative & Effective Workspace

Nowadays, many companies redesign their workspaces to stand out, to create a more balanced environment, to exhibit their brand, values and personalities.

In the last 10 years, employees have admitted that their relationship with work and their workspace have changed.

According to recent studies, only a small percentage of employees have a positive opinion of their workspace and the percentage gets even smaller when it comes to millenials.

Therefore, companies must adapt to meet the needs of this younger generation. That is why these companies are redesigning their workspace in the hopes of attracting and retaining young talents.

Wondering how to design a positive workspace in order to retain young talents?

Designing An Innovative & Effective Workspace #office #openspace #startupmentality #work #workplace #workspace journeytoleadershipblog.com

Benefits of redesigning the workspace

Workspace relates to the physical environment at work and can affect our life, mood, mental and physical well-being. It also involves workers safety, quality of work and of life.

Improving the workspace has considerable benefits for employees. Indeed, employees are healthier, more fulfilled, more engaged and more productive. Indeed, the well-being generated by a positive workspace leads to positive emotions, builds greater relationships, and fosters a sense of purpose.

For organization, a positive workspace drives better customer service, decreases absenteeism, saves time and money on the long-term.

Roadmap to creating the perfect workspace

There are no real roadmap to creating the perfect workspace but there are several criteria that come up when employees talk about improving their workspace.

To grade a workspace, employees take into account their working conditions, their working methods, their ability to focus, their level of productivity, and their creativity.

Building a healthy and innovative workspace

For the most part, companies have considered the following criteria to attract and retain young talents:

1. The startup mentality

Companies can start by updating the apparence of their building, opening up their workspace and creating a startup mentality.

Truthfully, most millennial don’t want to work in traditional workspaces anymore and prefer startups.

2. The healthy work-life balance

Organizations ought to create a healthy work-life balance.

Employees are best able to perform professionally when their personal life is in order. Companies must find a equilibrium between employees well-being and their productivity at work.

3. The use of external services

Integrating innovative and ethical services is a way fro companies to retain talents.

For example, some companies pay for cleaning services, tend to go green, monitor their energetical expenses daily, regularly test for ventilation and air quality. Others offer work out sessions and relaxation rooms.

4. The use of innovative and ergonomic equipment

Incorporating innovative and ergonomic equipment to prevent physical strain, pain and exhaustion increases employees engagement and value.

Most employees stay in a sitted position at their desk for hours at a time and don’t partake in physical activities.

Some workplaces are so sophisticated that they have installed sit-to-stand desk and different activities during working hours.

5. The minimization of paperwork and bureaucracy

Companies are able to retain their talents by allowing paperless procedures and reducing bureaucracy, by proposing communication apps, digital platforms for online training and for better communication.

On one hand, employees gain time and increase their efficiency.

On the other hand, companies become technologically savvy, agile and react more efficiently.

6. Learning and development opportunities

Providing training, learning and development opportunities says that your workspace values your employees skills and that it is geared towards innovation and learning.

Training stimulates the mind and opens it up to new and interesting ways of thinking and implementing their task.

Furthermore, training and development activities are an investment and are also the best place to introduce stress relief and stress management in the workplace.

7. The company culture

Hiring talents who will fit in the company culture is benefitial to the workspace.

Besides being competent for a given role, employees who fit into the culture tend to be more positive, perform at the best and treat customer and colleagues better.

8. The positioning of employees

Having employees work according to their strengths and weaknesses can only boost the general workspace.

Positive workspaces are constructed when employees are able to focus on tasks that interest them, are challenging and that utilize their strengths.

9. The inclusion of diversity

Diversity encourages communication, critical thinking, decision making, innovative ideas and personal growth.

10. Leadership

Promoting effective leadership is a sure way to support human basic needs and to promote healthy company culture.

Last Words Of Advice!

Research demonstrates that creating a healthy workspace, keeping employees happy and healthy increases the organization bottom-line and creates a more positive office culture.

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6 Success Strategies Of Highly Powerful Leaders

Powerful leaders remain in communication with their authentic self, are honest with themselves, reveal their true abilities and have developed their personal power.

They are confident enough to have achieved success on their own terms.

Wondering which strategies are mostly used by powerful leaders to achieve success?

6 Strategies Of Highly Powerful Leaders #power #leadership #success #personalpower #journeytoleadership journeytoleadershipblog.com

Strategy 1: Powerful leaders set intentions

Powerful leaders decide what they want even if they don’t know how to get it.

Then, they do whatever it takes to get it.

Basically, they declare their intentions and commit to them.

To set the best intentions possible, they get to know themselves and learn to deal with their strengths and weaknesses.

Strategy 2: Powerful leaders take risks

To achieve success, powerful leaders tend to let go of what is safe and familiar.

They learn that they have to give up the good for the great and chose what is right for them along the way.

Strategy 3: Powerful leaders focus on winning

At some point, powerful leaders take risks, play the game and play to win.

They focus on winning no matter what.

Strategy 4: Powerful leaders speak up

Powerful leaders speak up for themselves when something goes wrong or something is bothering them.

Speaking allows them not to play victim.

Unfortunately, in modern society, women who speak up still hold a negative connotation. Most of the time, outspoken women are seen as bitchy and are punished for speaking up. Whereas outspoken men are seen as assertive, direct and forceful.

Strategy 5: Powerful leaders stretch their abilities

Powerful leaders don’t stop at what is doable or at what they think they are capable of.

In addition, they take risks, stretch themselves, feel the fear but go after their goals anyway.

Consequently, they often bite off more than they can chew but still manage to succeed.

Strategy 6: Powerful leaders seek support

Powerful leaders surround themselves with people who can individually and collectively believe in their abilities, who can guide them, and who can show them how to succeed.

Last Words Of Advice!

Powerful leaders don’t wait for opportunities to come their way, they create them.
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4 Essential Learning Skills Every Leader Needs To Know Right Now

Throughout our life, we never stop learning.

By continually learning, you grow and open yourself up to new experiences and ideas.

Acquiring good learning skills builds up your confidence and your willingness to explore.

Wondering what are the essential learning skills that every leader should know?

4 Essential Learning Skills Every Leader Needs To Know Right Now #leaders #leadership #leadershipskills #learningskills #communicationskills #organizationskills #creativity #creativethinking #criticalthinking https://journeytoleadershipblog.com

What are learning skills? 

Learning skills are thinking skills and habits that you acquire in your childhood to help you learn and that you can perfect in adulthood.

Furthermore, learning skills is all about processing useful information, acquiring knowledge, self-regulating and making a sound decision.

Learning include reading, listening, focusing, remembering, confronting your understanding, practicing what you have learned, using the right tools and using time effectively.

1. Critical Thinking Skills

Learning is acquiring knowledge but not all knowledge is useful or will have a positive impact.

Therefore, leaders must develop critical thinking, become attentive to details, be selective of the knowledge that you acquire and store in your brain.

They must be able to think critically, make their own opinion and think independently, create their own experiences and increase self-awareness. They must also be able to classify and track their thoughts and ideas.

Furthermore, leaders must be able to break down, analyze, compare and understand a situation, an event or concept in order to reach a conclusion and take a measured decision.

2. Creative Thinking Skills

Creative thinking is the ability to be creative and to generate ideas.

With a sense of creativity, leaders are authentic, curious, open-minded, adapt easily and are capable of expressing themselves.

They are able to innovate, brainstorm with others, creatively assess a problem and come up with new and out of the box solutions.

3. Communication Skills

There are several ways to convey a message. Some leaders enjoy public speaking, some one on one conversations and others prefer reading or writing down their thoughts.

Leaders must be able to describe, share, argue, persuade, clarify, defend an idea, explain themselves and reach a solid conclusion. That way, they confront their own ideas and understanding.

They are also able to actively listen, evaluate an idea and engage with it.

4. Organizational skills

Organizational skills include time management, goal setting, schedule and event planning, productivity tracking, and progress measurement.

When leaders are organized, they tend to favor a clean and tidy workspace.

Being organized helps them alleviate the mental load, organize their thoughts, focus on the tasks at hand and meet their deadlines.

Organized leaders run the day and don’t let the day run them.

Last Words Of Advice!

Everybody learns differently.

It becomes useful to identify your preferred learning style as soon as possible.

 

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The Importance Of Kindness In Leadership

Kindness is extremely hard to implement in the world we live in today because according to popular belief, kindness is weakness…

However, in the workplace, kindness is essential to leadership success.

Furthermore, genuine acts of kindness in the workplace don’t go unnoticed as people tend to pay it forward.

Indeed, most people who have been through fire in their personal and professional life appreciate serenity and kindness. They would try everything to maintain their self-worth and peace of mind.

Wondering how to develop kindness in the workplace?

The Importance Of Kindness In Leadership #leadership #kindness journeytoleadershipblog.com

Benefits Of Kindness in Leadership

Kind leaders act with the best interest and on behalf of their team and organization. They are authentic, humble, have high morals and a sense of decency.

In kind organization, leaders believe that the people are the heart of the organization.

Furthermore, leaders are able to increase engagement and empower team members who gradually grow in confidence.

In addition, being kind doesn’t mean that you are soft, a pushover, that you are avoiding conflict, that you lack boundaries, that you are people pleasing or that you have to put up with bad behavior.

It means that you take time to listen and understand the people around you before acting or making a decision. It also means that you analyze the consequences of your decisions. 

1. Kind leaders are kind to themselves

Kind leaders are firstly kind to themselves and the people closest to them.

They celebrate their own success, forgive themselves when they make mistakes and set clear boundaries.

Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love. - Lao Tzu Click To Tweet

2. Kind leaders use the Golden Rule

The best and strongest leaders put people first and treat their team with kindness.

They acknowledge people, show respect and demonstrate that they care. They simply treat people the way they want to be treated. They understand that they can get more things done, they have to treat people like people.

For example, they have face to face conversations and ask people how they are doing. They can be generous with their time and actively listen to people.

3. Kind leaders set clear expectations

They let people know what needs to be done to avoid miscommunication, misinterpretation, misdirections.

They don’t give out false objectives and avoid sending their team members on a wild goose chase. They celebrate their success and the success of others..

Team members will then commit to their work and reach their goals.

4. Kind leaders tell the truth

Telling the truth encourages growth within the team and builds up the leader’s credibility and respect.

They understand that the truth comes with consequences but they also want the best out of their teams so they overpass their need for self-preservation or self-interest.

They place people in the right positions and give honest feedback to help people perform at their best.

5. Kind leaders agree to disagree

A difference in opinion doesn’t dictate their character.

They have great communication skills and can handle tough conversations.

They don’t ostracize or belittle people who don’t like them.

6. Kind leaders believe in equality and equity

They treat everyone equally, regardless of their personal bias, stereotypes, personality, character and performance.

They are culturally sensitive and advocate for inclusion.

7. Kind leaders create a safe environment

Kind workplaces increase productivity and improve the company culture.

Leaders understand that employees need to feel safe in order to be productive.

Unkind leaders instill fear and use their power and position to make their employees comply. Employees feel unsafe and tend to quit their jobs or resort to the same bad behavior to survive.

Last Words Of Advice!

What of being kind requires too much time and effort that I don’t have? Kindness is a long term investment that requires authenticity, strength and courage.

There are some people who will create chaos, use fear and anger as a management, and try to discourage you from being kind.

 

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22 Things You Should Never Say At Work

If you are like me, then you have a serious case of the “Foot In Mouth Syndrome” which consists of saying things that inadvertently offend or embarrass people or yourself.

It is basically the art of saying things that you regret.

It is a real disease that plagues some of us, whether you are talkative or not, introverted or extroverted, thoughtful or not, mature or not.

To overcome this issue, we have to develop communication skills and tactfulness.

We just have to be extra careful to who we talk to, how we talk and what we say.

We just have to constantly monitor ourselves, filter ourselves more than usual, be more quiet than necessary, educate ourselves on our audience at all times.

We spend time fixing things and explaining what we meant.

We spend time avoiding expressions, topics and certain people.

22 Things You Should Never Say At Work

In the workplace, there are a few phrases that are tactless and unforgivable and that you must avoid at all cost.

1. Silence as a cure

Staying silent doesn’t help circumvent the issue.

I have learnt this the hard way.

When you are too quiet, people will usually fill in the blanks with negative thoughts. Nobody will say: Tim is quiet because he is shy, introverted or cares a lot about the words that come out his mouth. Instead, they will say: Tim doesn’t speak to us because he doesn’t like us or because he thinks he is better than us.

Moreover, when you are too quiet, people will soon disregard you and forget that you exist.

It is better to minimize or actively filter the words you say than to stay silent.

People make mistakes all the time. You will just apologize if you have to.

2. Unintelligible speech

Fear of saying something unforgivable can make us do crazy things like speaking unintelligibly.

Fear can make us do crazy things. Period.

Speaking unintelligibly constitutes an attitude of avoidance. By doing this, you are straining your interlocutor and creating misunderstandings.

Very soon, nobody will want to talk to you. It becomes imperative that you build up some confidence, articulate and speak at a respectable volume.

3. Offensive speech

When we find ourselves in a stressful situations, it feels convenient and relieving to swear.

Studies show that the people who swear the most are very honest (very honest about their feelings, I’d say).

However, in the workplace, not everybody is comfortable with offensive language and you wouldn’t want to damage your self-image.

The best option is to stay from curse words all together or replace them with better language.

4. “It’s not fair”

Life is hard. Everybody has their personal challenges and unfair moments.

If you have put in the work and have not been recognized or recompensed, it’s OK. Your prince will come someday.

Sometimes, you have been doing something wrong that you are not fully aware of and you may want to discuss your performance with your trusted circle.

If you have been on the receiving end of continual unfair treatment, it’s time to move on to another job where you can put your skills to work.

5. “I didn’t double check that”

Unless you are the most perfect being walking the face of the earth, you will want to double check your work.

This comment makes you seem full of yourself and you open yourself up to criticism.

Everybody is susceptible to mistakes and need to pay attention to details.

6. “I’m busy” or “I don’t have time for this”

In the workplace, you should be able to prioritize your tasks and manage your own time.

By saying this, you are stating your incompetence, your lack of organizational skills, lack of patience or your laziness.

You can find ways to communicate your business without being rude or ask to reschedule.

That being said, some toxic leaders give their employees more work load than a regular person can handle. If you have a toxic leader, just make it clear that the task is not feasible in the time demanded.

7. “I’m bored” or “I have nothing else to do”

If you are bored at work, then you are in the wrong job or you are not being challenged enough.

To get out your boredom, you can either ask for more responsibilities, show some initiative or just be quiet about it.

8. “I’ll try”

This phrase implies the possibility of failure.

It is better to say “I will” or “I’ll do my best” because you make yourself accountable for your actions and means that you will put your best foot forward to succeed.

The worst that can happen is that you fail to deliver. But, you did your best, you will learn from your mistakes and grow as a person.

9. “That’s impossible” or “There’s nothing I can do”

That is a self-defeating and limiting phrase.

It means that you are not solution oriented and that you don’t even want to try.

10. “But we’ve always done it that way”

Well, this phrase might sound familiar to a lot of people.

It has been said by a lot of people, especially if they are experts, have been in the same position for the longest while or are resistant to change.

Truth is, not because you have been doing it one way that it is the only or that it is the right way.

Instead, it is best to state the reasons why you may want to keep doing it that way.

11. “I know that”

No, you don’t know. Stop.

If you did, you would be working for yourself and conversing with yourself. You wouldn’t need to exchange information with somebody. You would be the greatest and surest source of information of the universe.

Even if you really did know something, you should discipline your ego and your need to demonstrate your intellect.

Chances are the person sharing information with you will not want to share again.

Chances are when you will want information, people will assume that you already know.

Chances are when you will want information, you will feel embarrassed to come forward.

12. Strong No

There is an unwritten rule in the workplace which is to never openly use the word no.

If you are a straightforward person, you might be tempted to use it. You may think that you are decisive and that you know what you want or don’t want.

However, you will look harsh and it would be very hard to come back on the no without looking indecisive.

There are different ways that you can say no without employing the word in itself.

You can simply give the real reason why you are implicitly saying no or say something to effect of “I have prior engagement” or “I’ll think about it”.

13. Unwilling yes

Saying yes especially when you don’t want to oblige may be just as bad as saying no.

It is better to grow a backbone, stop people pleasing (easier said than done) and learn different ways to say no.

14. “Sorry but…”

You can apologize sincerely (once) if you have made a mistake but sorry is rarely enough and you will have to put in the work to fix things.

There is no need to beg for forgiveness because the best apology is changed behavior.

15. “That’s not my problem”, “That’s not in my job description” or “I don’t get paid enough for this”

I understand this approach or why someone would use these phrases.

Sometimes, we want to mind our business, don’t want to step on people’s toes and get out the scope of our job descriptions. Meddling in others activities can be a huge source of conflict or seeming to eager to please can lead you to be overworked and underpaid.

However, these specific phrases give off the vibe that you don’t care, that you hate your job or that you don’t want more responsibilities. If there is an opportunity to evolve, you will not be chosen.

Instead, you can recommend someone for this task, express that you will take care of this as soon as you finish your more urgent and adequate tasks (which may take a while).

Appreciate the situation for what it is and take the opportunity to try new things and get out of your comfort zone.

16. “I don’t need help”

Employers value people who are autonomous, who don’t expect hand-holding or for other people to do their job.

The reality is we all need help from time to time whether we want to admit it or not.

Permanently locking yourself off is simply an ego move and asking for help sometimes is OK.

Furthermore, people will like you more if you ask them for favors or for help.

17. “You are wrong”, “You make no sense”, and “You misunderstood”

Even if this is true and even if the situation is heated, there is no need play the blame game.

The blame game never results in resolve but in more blame shifting.

When in conflict, you either want to convince the other person of your point of view or put an end to all exchange.

The easiest way out is to ask for further clarification or clarify your point of view and move on.

18. “You should have…” or “You could have…”

These phrases are confidence killers whether you say them to yourself or to someone else. Relax, mistakes happen all the time and eventually you have to keep swimming.

The most important part is to take responsibility for your mistakes and quickly find solutions to the problem.

19. “I may be wrong, but…” or “I don’t want to steer you in the wrong direction, but…”

These phrases denote your lack of confidence.

The truth is that you dismiss yourself before others do.

To boost your confidence, just state what you are thinking. If your statement is wrong, then it is wrong. There is no need for a full disclaimer.

20. “It’s not my fault” and “I am only following orders”

Well that’s an easy way out!

Some people refrain from taking initiative or making decision just so they can shift blame.

Shifting blame is the fastest to create tension in the workplace. Even if you have nothing to do with the mistake, find different ways to fix the situation.

21. “At my last job…”

This statement immediately puts people in defense mode whether you or talking about people or work processes because you start gossiping, comparing and criticizing.

It implies that you feel like you have been better places and you are not able or willing to adapt to your new environment.

Making nonconstructive or judgmental statements can ruin a career.

22. “I quit”

Sometimes, you are just going through a phase where you want to quit and give up.

There is no need to speak your mind out loud and let everybody know that you are on the brink of quitting.

Instead, take a break from what you are doing and if you are about to quit, move in silence.

Last Words Of Advice!

Communicating with tact is a skill that you can acquire with time.

Everybody puts their feet in their mouth from time to time.

So, don’t beat yourself up.

 

Hope that I’ve helped you get it together on your way to leadership!

Don’t forget to like, share and leave a comment below.

 

 

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Start.: Punch Fear in the Face, Escape Average, and Do Work That Matters By Jon Acuff

In life, we must always take a step back and ask ourselves the following question: “Where am I?“.

Everybody successful person who has accomplished something in life went through the following 5 stages in life: Learning, Editing, Mastering, Harvesting and Guiding.

Most people don’t follow these 5 stages and instead choose the Average Path. Why?

Because the Average Path is comfortable and effortless. People who go down the average path are just existing and don’t make decisions.

Start.: Punch Fear in the Face, Escape Average, and Do Work That Matters By Jon Acuff

How to get away from the Average Path?

To get away from the Average Path, you just need to Start no matter how old you are

In reality, the way you Start your journey in 100% in your control. You are sure of your Start but you will not know how it will end.

To have a good Start, you must first be realistic about your current situation and your goals in life.

You have to be focused and work hard on your Start.

You must also recover a childlike perception of yourself all while using the tools you have gained as an adult.

Do I Need To Know My Purpose To Start?

You don’t need to figure out your purpose to Start.

You don’t need to determine the end results before taking your first step because doing so puts too much pressure on you.

Furthermore, you will not want to do anything and will not want to fix your life before finding it.

The truth is you don’t need to find your purpose but just do everything with purpose. You can start anything you want without a purpose.

What Happens When I Start?

When you start going after the things you want, fear will show its ugly face.

It will make you question your self-worth and make your journey more torturous.

It will make you think that it’s too late and that you are behind in schedule.

It will tell you that everything needs to be perfect.

You honestly have to find a way to deal with your fears.

You have to live your life without regrets.

The Learning Stage

At this stage, you are in your 20’s.

You are still testing the waters and trying to figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life.

The Editing Stage

In your 30’s, you start looking back at your 20’s.

You select what matters most to you and going after what worked for you in the past.

You start focusing on your career and relationships. 

To edit your life, value what you have, search for your passions, find out what brings you the most joy and what activities align most with who you are at your core.

You don’t have to wait for outside to live the life you really want to live.

You don’t have to stay places where you grow as a person or where you have no passion for.

The Mastering Stage

In your 40’s, you mastered every thing that is important to you.

You are more self-assured and are certain about where you are going.

To master your life, you have to put in the hours and hone your craft by volunteering, taking up part time jobs and participating in hobbies that bring you closer to your goals.

In mastering your life, you will face many obstacles and challenges.

The Harvesting Stage

In your 50’s, you reap what you have sowed in your 30’s and 40’s.

In this stage, it is wise to:

  • Treat people right
  • Not get complacent or lazy
  • Treat your accomplishments as rewards and not reasons for what you do.

The Guiding Stage

At this stage, your are in your 60’s.

You are retired and enjoying the fruits of your labor.

You start mentoring, helping people on their journey and start giving back to your community.

But once you are in this stage, you have to return to the Learning Stage and start all over again. To guide people, you must ask people questions and listen to their stories.

Then, you can tie your guiding experiences to something you were always interested in. 

Review

Start.: Punch Fear in the Face, Escape Average, and Do Work That Matters by Jon Acuff is a funny book with great life lessons.

The principles behind the Start.: Punch Fear in the Face, Escape Average, and Do Work That Matters are very similar to those in The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey.

Jon Acuff‘s examples and introspective comments are hilarious but also liberating. He shares his strengths, his weaknesses and doesn’t take himself too seriously.

I truly recommend this book because it provides comfort and encouragement. In addition, at the end of the book, Jon Acuff shares a practical step by step guide for you to overcome fear and escape average. 

Let me know below what you think about this book!

Favorite quote(s)

the surprises life gives are always better than the things you think you see coming.

Average is so popular because average is familiar. We all know how to do average. Ninetynine percent of the people on the planet do average. The road is well worn, the decisions are obvious, and the next steps are crystal clear.

Every journey has a first step. Every dream has a first destination.

No matter what fear and doubt tell you, your identity is not at stake with the decisions you make and the actions you take as you learn.

Don’t buy the lie that changing the world has to be a chore or make you miserable. Be brave enough to have fun with whatever you whittle down in your life.

Ratings 4/5

Author

Jon Acuff

 

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